The Hills: The Land of Awkward

Last night was overwhelming; between the return of Gossip Girl and another episode of The Hills I just couldn’t stop trembling with excitement. Luckily, the shows weren’t back to back and I had some time between to make some pizza matzoh. Delish.

While I chomped away on my Passover snack, I watched an unusually high amount of drama unfold. Even for this group of girls. The entire episode made me feel uncomfortable; like watching Meet the Parents, or The Office when Michael and Jan had the dinner party. It felt like every possible weird combo of people possible in L.A. happened. The only thing that would have been worse was if Jason showed up with his weird post-rehab wife. And then started making out with Heidi.

I mean, how awkward is it that Audrina is friends with Heidi who is friends with Stephanie who is friends with Lauren? And, as we all know, Stephanie also happens to be the sister/roommate of Spencer. She really is at the center of the drama and, somehow, has gotten everyone to trust her. Lauren wants her as a friend; Heidi wants her as her boyfriend-bashing confidant; and Spencer wants her to clean up after him.

How is it that knowing she is mixing with all parties, everyone seems to keen on trusting her/confiding in her/not questioning her shady motives? Especially Heidi! Is it normal to not only stay best friends with your ex’s (or that guy you are currently on a relationship vacation with’s) sister, but to also talk so much crap about him to her? They do live together, Heidi.

Anyways, even more awkward is the return of Justin Bobby. And the fact that everyone calls him Justin Bobby…even to Audrina’s face. How amazing? I was quite excited when he was spotted at the bar and even more ecstatic when he plopped himself down between Heidi and Audrina…while Lauren was two seats down! Does it really get any better than that?

Lauren, naturally, is not a fan of JB. But after Audrina returns from their “not date” she explains all the ways he has changed. He moved! He stopped drinking! He is no longer sporting the crocheted hats (that, ironically, Lauren is now donning)! HE DIDN’T BURP! Wow, a total 180. How can Lauren not support this?

I am sure Audrina is still smitten with this boy – why, I will never understand – but part of me feels like she is really doing it all as a rebellion. Just like how she is now hanging out with Heidi. Lauren is like the mean mommy giving Audrina all these rules. It is obvious that one day little baby Audrina is going to grow up, rebel and come home with a biker boyfriend, a drug habit and some freaky tattoos. Or Lauren’s enemy and a dirty boy-toy.

But, even though Audrina is bringing home all the trash, LC and Lo decide to ask her to move into a house with them. Which also happened to be quite awkward. Instead of just saying, “Hey, the lease is up why don’t we move to a house so Lo can move in too?” Lauren basically says, “Lo is my best friend and we are really close, so it may be weird for you because you will be the third wheel but we have been looking for a house and you happen to be eating with us at the moment so maybe you should move in too?” I cringed.

The house warming party next week is looking pretty freaking sweet. JB is coming. And, obviously, The Pratt-ette. And, not-so-obviously, Stephen!? I hope cocktails will be served…and some sort of brawl breaks out. Rarrrr.

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