For all intents and purposes, I am a pretty confident gal. I think my personality is the bomb.com, I am funny, I have a great haircut and – when I put on enough makeup – I can look pretty damn good.
But, just like any normal person, I have my insecurities. I am not as skinny as the other girls out at the bar, my boobs are a little…well…little, and no matter how good I look, I know there are Barbie look alikes all around me.
So, I must wonder why on earth I keep finding myself in the arms of some ridiculously good looking guys. Like, the guy you admire from afar but never talk to because you know he’s got a Heidi Klum lookin’ GF on the other side. The same exact guys who would never give me a second look, let alone an orgasm when I was in school.
I am not complaining – far from it – but I just don’t understand why suddenly these sexy, tall, sexy, way out of my league (did I mention sexy?) guys keep wanting me. What is different now from then?
I was discussing this with a friend yesterday – after returning from the clutches of such a man – trying to find some insight. What exactly am I doing that can trick these boys into wanting to see me sans clothing?
“You are not fooling anyone, Lauren,” she yelled at me. “You have a lot to offer. And you prove it to them by approaching them with confidence.”
I didn’t buy the first part, but she had a really good point. People are always talking about confidence being the sexiest thing a woman can have, and I now know it’s true. When you act confidently, everyone around you will notice. They will immediately be drawn to the confidence and realize that there must be something pretty damn awesome about you if you can walk around without a worry in the world (besides that near-empty beer in your hand).
What is different now, I am beginning to see, is that I don’t drift into the background anymore, fearing the rejection of men as they pick up my better looking friends. I don’t stand around waiting for a cute boy to approach me. I rock what my mama (and MAC) gave me, and chase what I want.
And I get it. Sometimes more than once in the night.
And again in the morning.