Look through my phonebook. The list is never-ending. Dan. Paul. Rick. Mike. Javier. Alex. Nicolas. Nicolas #2. Cedric. Brandon. And so on. Not to brag, but I’m something of a certified P-I-M-P. Poppin’ the collar all over the place. And brushing my shoulders off.
I wouldn’t put myself on player status, because that’s not what it’s about. No one actually gets ahead by playing games. Games are childish. People do actually get ahead by meeting new people, and being able to go for what they want.
Like that guy. The incredibly sexy one across the room. Dark hair falling in his very green eyes. And a crowd around him that’s ten chicks deep.
The Strategy? Don’t pay him too much attention.
It works every time; if he really is that hot, he knows it. And if he didn’t know it, the girls throwing themselves at him will have been a good wakeup call. So why not switch The Game up on him? You’re cute. You’re fun. And you are the one chick he can’t just wrap around his finger. Or at least you’re pretending like you are.
I’m not talking about your middle school cold-shoulder tactics. The point is simply not to let this guy know that inside you’re going googly-eyed. Usually, one firm, flirty look is all you need. Then continue with your evening. Laugh with your girlfriends. Look stupid on the dance floor. Do whatever it is that you would normally do if dreamboat weren’t standing over there in the corner.
About halfway through the night, you might want to give dreamboat a reminder that you’re still there and pointedly walk past him, and then maybe go order a drink by yourself, so that he doesn’t have to awkwardly say something to you in front of all your drooling girlfriends.
If you get introduced to him (or even if you don’t), turn on the inner charm full blast. Look at him straight in the eyes. I mean, really in the eyes. And smile in a warm and inviting, but not overly seductive way. Sounds technical, I know. You can practice in the mirror.
If you get to the point (or muster up the courage) where you decide you want to say something to him, it’s best to think of something conversational to start with. Small talk. Chit chat. Compliment his shirt, or his shoes (in a manly way), or talk about the party you’re at: “How did you hear about this place?” Or you could just do it the old fashioned way and introduce yourself.
The real trick is just to be yourself; it’s not anything new. Smile, look approachable, relax. Have fun with your friends. That old saying, “Nothing is sexier than confidence,” got its proverbial status for a reason. Put on your cutest clothes – not that super-low neckline that makes you worry about your boobs popping out all night – but those jeans that hug your booty just right, those earrings that accent your cheekbones. Play up those things that you love about yourself. Remind yourself that you are beautiful and amazing before you go out the door. And then later on, if you can’t bring yourself to actually say anything to him, at least you will be holding the gaze of every man in the room.
In my experience, the cliché moves like leaving your phone number on a napkin, or slipping it into his pocket on the way out the door don’t actually work, and usually leave you feeling like an embarrassed, giddy schoolgirl. Not to mention that I can never go back to the restaurant again if that cute waiter doesn’t call.
Now, this is not a guaranteed guide, so don’t sue me if it doesn’t work. But I’ve seen a fair amount of success (if you know what I’m sayin’), and my findings have been corroborated by my fellow girls, as well as my guy friends.
We can always use more advice. What has worked for you?
[Photo courtesy of coolspotters.com]