The Pissed List: Where are You Hanson? And Spencer is STILL a Moron

 

[I like to think of myself as a pretty easy going gal, and try not to sweat the small stuff. But sometimes (ok, maybe slightly more often) the general cluelessness, carelessness and overall stupididty of some things and or/people really gets to me. I find that venting is the most efficient way to rid myself of the stress that idiots, wrong meal orders, lack of cell phone ettiquette and cheese flavored products (that don’t even contain any freaking cheese!) induce. So, in an attempt to avoid an ulcer or an unfortuante road rage incident, I vent to you, dear reader. Please feel free to join in and comment about anything–really, anything–that pissed. you. off. this week. Let it all hang out. I feel you.]

Hanson.
You guys were the opening act to my young and turbulent love life. Zac, you and I shared something so special (which you didn’t know about, but poor Robbie who sat next to me in second grade sure as hell did—my Mmm Bopping skills were not as advanced as yours, unfortunately.) You guys pretty much paved the way for one of my most important imaginary relationships with Lance, JC and Justin (obv) and I eliminated the need for my Mom’s Laura Ashley wallpaper using only creepy pictures of the three of you looking girlishly innocent (um, except for you Isaac; sorry you had to go through puberty in the midst of your stardom). Surely you all knew how important it was to uphold your fine musical talent and the pride you all brought to Tulsa, right? WRONG! A quick little ‘where they are now’: Taylor is married (has been since he was 19!) with three kids and expecting numero cuatro. My beloved Zac is also wifed up and became a Daddy last May . Isaac, ironically now the hottest by far, is also married, with children. While I am super upset that they haven’t maintained their pop idol status and never named a song after me (but managed to get around to Madeline and Lucy!), the boys are out doing good in the world nowadays; their Walk tour is to raise awareness about HIV/Aids and poverty in Africa so yes, Hanson you still make my heart melt (suck it JoBros!).
Proposition 8.
The ban on gay marriage that was voted for in California last week is disturbing as a representation of how certain Americans feel against other Americans. If civil marriage is a civil right, how does this ban not violate the underlying laws of humanity present in our constitution. I understand that our government is founded on Puritan beliefs. I understand that deeply religious people may oppose something they believe to be morally wrong. What I don’t understand is when religion overpowered basic conscience and why the hell those who don’t believe in same sex marriage give a hoot if they’re not the ones engaging in gay unions. “I just found out that my state doesn’t really think I’m a person,” said Rose Aplustill, 21 a citizen of California. Well Rose, darling, I sure as hell think you’re a person but I severely doubt the humanity of those who voted to alienate a basic right of their fellow citizen. The fight for equality needs to continue and when our generation holds the power in our government, I hope our children all share the same bewilderment that I do now as to what is so very “wrong” with civil marriage.
Drunken A$$holes.
Football season seems to give them myriad opportunities to crawl out of cracks in the sidewalk (or perhaps vacate their couches) to run amok and cause general annoyance among those of us who can respectably handle our keg stands. Ladies, do not sensually rub the chest of a man uncomfortably sending “Help Me!” signals to his girlfriend who is standing 4 feet away, not so amused. Gentlemen, please refrain from slurring “nice tits” at the closest thing in a tube top…and then proceeding to repeat it after she tries to politely yet disgustedly ignore you. If you can’t take the shots, get out of the kitchen and take that shiz outside where you’ll inevitably end up vomming later and leave the rest of the merry revelers in peace. Kthnx.
Speidi’s Ignorange, as per usual.
Not to beat a dead horse but, speaking of gay marriage and asshats, Perez has good ol’ Spence quoted as saying “Like I’ve always said: Heidi’s hair and makeup people are some of my favorite homosexuals on the planet, and if they want to marry each other, I’m not about to be like, ‘Don’t’. Perez gently corrects him by alluding to gay lawyers and firemen and appreciates Spencer’s embracing of equality “in his own Spencer way” but please Perez, pretty pretty please let him have it the next time he says something asenine and stereotypical.
Ok Lovelies, shout it out: What pissed YOU off this week?

Top 5 Things You MUST Do In College Pt. 2: Know Your College Town Beyond The Pub Crawl
Top 5 Things You MUST Do In College Pt. 2: Know Your College Town Beyond The Pub Crawl
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