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Nothing Comes Between Me and My Calvins


The new Calvin Klein Jeans commercial is HOT. So hot that it has already been banned from late night television. I have to say, I’m going to join the masses and deem this offensive. Unlike the FCC, though, it wasn’t the oh-so-steamy kissing, playful touching, or racy threesome action that did me in (in fact I enjoyed watching this commercial over, and over, and over… for research purposes, of course). So what did I think was so offensive?

Did you see those pants?? Pry your eyes from sweaty, pretty people and check them out. Those are offensively ugly.

Calvin Klein is notorious for being provocative – always pushing the limits of “sex sells.” But maybe CK wouldn’t need to be so provocative if he managed to showcase a pair of jeans that weren’t saggy, cuffed and strange. I was more interested in models Edita Vilkeviciute, Anna Selezneva, Anna Jagodzinska, Natasha Poly, Vladimir Ivanov, and Danny Schwarz than I was in the jeans. I’m no marketing major, but I don’t think that’s the point of a commercial. If they were trying to sell the idea that hot people can wear ugly pants and still look hot, well, I’m sold.

Brooke Shields once said, “Nothing comes between my and my Calvins.” I’m going to have to respectfully disagree, Brooke; I could thing of several things that I would like to come between me and my Calvins. Most notably, Danny Schwarz.