There’s no doubt about it – we all want to fall in love eventually. Of course, some of us want it just a little more than others. Take Neenah Pickett, for example. She wants to find her man, badly. She wants to find him so bad, in fact, that she’s given herself a deadline to get her ass in gear. She’s given herself 52 weeks (1 year, for you slow thinkers) to find her husband. And, trust me, this ain’t no half-assed New Year’s resolution biz.
She’s so serious that she has actually made her own website to get her name out there.
Before you throw things at your screen and start talkin’trash about what a crazy bia Neenah is, take a moment. This isn’t much worse than what many of us do in relationships. Ok, maybe the website thing is, but still; there is a wide spectrum of ridiculous deadlines we put on ourselves to find a relationship. Here is just a smidgen of some of the…interesting…declarations that I’ve heard thus far…
I haveee to get married by the time I’m 23 – I have a friend who strictly believes that she has to get married at the age of 22. Her mom and her grandmother got married at the age of 22, which obviously means that she has to get married at 22 too, right? Did I mention that she first told me this when we were in 7th grade? Unfortunately, this sort of hasty deadline can lead to nothing less than a complete disaster. What if you happen to be dating a 53 year old garbage man when you’re 22? Okay, that’s pretty unlikely but you get the point – wait for the one that you actually want, not just the one that’s around at the right time.
I’m not getting married until my looks fade…at the age of 65 – No lie, I used to tell people this allll the time. (Super embarrassing, I know). For most of my adult-ish life, I have been the blissful single girl. I did not want a relationship and honestly, I wasn’t really expecting to find one for a while. Uhhh until I did. Seriously, this ish creeps up on you faster than a pimple on prom night. And when it does, no matter how hard you try, there will be no way you will be able to pass it up.
I don’t want to be tied down until I’ve settled down – Now this one seems a tad more rational than my “looks fade” guideline. You are an ambitious, college-educated woman that has a lot of goals. And let’s face it, often a man doesn’t really fit into that equation. Whether you want to travel the world or establish your own law firm, you need the freedom to be able to obtain your goals. Like I said, however, you can’t easily ignore an opportunity when it comes flying at your face. So which one should you choose? Both, duhhhh. If you find “the one” and he doesn’t support and encourage your goals, then he really isn’t “the one,” is he?
I guess what I’m trying to say here is that you can’t put a deadline on anything. Sure you can take your love life into your own hands like Neenah by putting yourself out there, but you really can’t do much more than that. And I’m not sure any man will find that sort of desperation attractive.
Just live your life, go for everything you want, and when you least expect it, you’ll run into a relationship like a brick wall. In a good way, of course.
Do you or your friends have embarrassingly peculiar deadlines?