Dear College: I Want My Money Back

suing school

After four years of attending a Big 10 school, I am now in big time debt.  I’ll be in even more debt after I return for yet another semester.  Do I have a job?  No.  Has my university made good on their promise to hook me up with sweet career options and internships?  No.  All jobs and internships that I have had were found on my own time and through my own devices (and only one of those actually had anything to do with my major).

So…what exactly am I paying for (besides education)??

Well, at least someone else is thinking along the same lines.  A Bronx woman is suing her college for $70,000 or roughly what she paid in tuition fees because the career center hasn’t given her any advice or career leads. 

Well well well – I can think of LOTS of things (besides my bleak future) for which I want my money back!  How about a lawsuit for all the fifths of alcohol I had to throw out my window or toss down the sink because my RA suddenly realized that my “study group” came in costumes and left wasted?  What about suing for mental ill health due to severe exam stress?  Or suing for the 15 lbs I gained sometime freshman year and haven’t managed to lose since then (despite the fact that my classes seem to be 14 miles apart from each other)?

I guess the point of this is that everyone is broke and we want some of our money back. We’re not getting what we paid for, dammit; the least they can do is cut us a check. Maybe the solution is getting rid of the university career centers (which are proving to be useless anyway) and giving a tuition break with all the money saved.  Or maybe we should all just stop whining and start taking responsibility for ourselves (I’m talking to you, Bronx Lady).

Either way, I’m gonna have to talk to someone about that water gun my Floor Mentor took from me freshman year.  That’s gotta be worth at least $2.50 by now…

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