Sexy Time: Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire

Blonde is my natural hair color. I rarely drink this much. I’m enjoying being single.

We all lie, in some form or another. We lie to our parents (it’s not a hangover; it’s a stomach bug), our teachers (I’m late because the bus was delayed, not because I forgot to set my alarm), our employers (it’s my mom’s birthday, not some girl in my hall’s 21st) and our sexual partners (you’re the best I’ve ever had!).

Lying to someone you’re sleeping with is dangerous territory, though. By lying to them, you could be endangering their physical (or mental) health. Which lies are OK to tell, and what things do we have to fess up too?

Lie: I’ve never worn this lingerie for anyone else.

Verdict: OK. We all have a favorite pair of lingerie, and we’ve probably worn it with more than one partner. After all, good lingerie is expensive, and we shouldn’t have to throw it out just because a relationship ends. But your partner probably doesn’t want to know what you wore last time you canoodled with someone else, so it’s okay to keep that information to yourself, or fib a little if it comes up.

Lie: I never slept with [insert friend here].

Verdict: BAD. The truth will come out eventually, and it will not be pretty. How would you feel if you found out one of your partner’s close friends was actually someone they used to sleep with? It’s best to have this information up front.

Lie: Your family/friends are so much fun.

Verdict: OK. You might hate the way his best friend burps or her crazy uncle that gets way too competitive playing volleyball, but your partner doesn’t need to be privy to this information. These people are going to be in their life for a while, so you best learn to deal with them, or at least act like you have.

Lie: I don’t have a crush on my chem professor.

Verdict: OK. You don’t have to fess up to every little crush you have, as long as there is no chance of the crush leading to anything real. Although, if you do fess up to it, you can probably convince your partner to role-play it with you.

Lie: I’ve always used condoms.

Verdict: BAD. Lying about your sexual health is never OK. If you have had unprotected sex, fess up and get tested, to keep you both healthy.

Lie: I came.

Verdict: BAD. Faking orgasms only hurts your sex life. When you say you like something, you encourage your partner to do it more often. If you lie about having orgasms, your partner will keep doing what they think works, and you’ll suffer the consequences.

What are some lies you’ve told to a sexual partner?

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