Weekly Ten: Celebs We Love to Hate

Every week, I write CollegeCandy’s Weekly Ten on whatever hard-hitting issue I find relevant. It doesn’t get more hard-hitting than CollegeCandy, people. Stay with me.

Always entertained by the fantastic “Celebretard Showdowns,” I was inspired to write a top ten list of the celebs that I (and hopefully you) love to hate. We hate them, we want them out of our lives, but we can’t stop reading, blogging and talking about these trainwrecks.

10. Paris Hilton
Is there anyone more entertaining than Miss Hilton? From her sex tape to the Simple Life, we can’t get enough of her. Her prison scandal was a headliner on CNN, MSNBC, FOX News and all other news outlets. Even though her vocabulary consists of about thirty words and phrases, similar to a talking doll, her vapid, gangly bottle blonde self still draws the attention of millions. Now that’s hot.

9. Kanye West
[kahn-yay west] noun
1. The next Michael Jackson
2. See Douchebag.
Kanye will forever be remembered for some of his famous quotes. My personal favorite, “I’m the closest that Hip Hop is getting to God. In some situations I’m like ghetto Pope.”

Well played, Mr. West. Well played.

8. Miley Cyrus
It’s Miley! Aw, what a nugget of future trainwreck. I can’t wait to see how she grows up. I smell a Very Mischa Future for her.

7. Lindsay Lohan
I love Lindsay. I love everything about her, from the Adderall to the showing up at her ex’s house drunkenly to the insane dad to the alleged theft. Can’t get enough of her. She certainly puts my mistakes into perspective, and I thank her for that.

6. The Kardashians
The whole family is a complete circus. I mean, they have their own reality show. Where the prepubescent girls are practicing stripping. Kim Kardashian is famous for a sex tape and her step dad is famous for winning a gold medal back in the stone age. Not to mention, Bruce is a great advertisement for male Botox. What’s not to love to hate? Khloe, I exclude you from all of that. I really just love you.

5. Speidi
These two might be the smartest people in Hollywood. The contrived photo shoots. The tears on “I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here!” They own their fakeness. We hate them for it, but we sure do love some posed pictures of them making out in face masks when we’ve got a Swine Flu crisis on our hands.

4. Jennifer Aniston
On the complete flip-side of a contrived couple, we have Miss Aniston. So natural. So girl next door. So effing boring and yet still all up in my celeb gossip. Good lord, woman. Just get married and stop making movies forever.

3. Megan Fox
The perfect woman! If only she was a mute.

2. Lady GaGa
Is it just me or is she super overrated? No? Okay, well what about this outfit.

1. Britney Spears
The ringleader of it all. Brit-Brit, you will never cease to fascinate the world. We’ve loved you since age 16 and we’ll keep on loving you right up until you become full-blown Liza Minelli crazy.

Honorable Mentions: Mischa Barton, Angelina Jolie, Jon and Kate (forget about their 8 soon-to-be in therapy), Paul Abdul, Kathy Griffin, Nicole Richie, Sienna Miller.

Melanie currently interning in NYC, taking full advantage of all margarita specials and those blonde summer boys. Stalk her on Twitter: @tinkermellie

Overheard: Off The Sofa
Overheard: Off The Sofa
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