Halloween has always been one of my favorite holidays. I could never understand what wasn’t to like. All the store windows are covered in cotton cobwebs and fake skeletons, people hand you free candy everywhere you go and you can dress up as absolutely anything and walk around in public without being judged. Did I mention the free candy?
It doesn’t matter whether you’re seven or 21, this holiday rocks. What changes, though, is the reasoning behind your excitement. Clearly, we spend the holiday a little differently now then we did back then.
Then: It gave us an excuse to have a party during math class.
Now: It gives us (a valid) excuse to party for a week straight.
Then: We grabbed the biggest bag we could to load up on candy.
Now: We grab biggest burrito we can to load up on carbs to coat our stomachs for the festivities.
Then: We dressed up as our favorite Disney princess.
Now: We dress up as our favorite Disney princess… minus 7 inches of fabric.
Then: “I’ll give you two Kit Kat’s and a nerd rope for that giant Hershey bar!”
Now: “Why don’t we go back to my place, Sexy Police Officer?”
Then: We weren’t allowed to take candy from strangers.
Now: We’ll take a drink from anyone.
Then: When we got home, mom would undress us and we’d eat a little candy.
Now: When we get home, “sexy police officer” undresses us and we get a little lucky.
Then: Your mom sent pictures of you and your siblings dressed up to grandma.
Now: Your mom calls and asks you to take down the Facebook photos of you dressed up like a hooker before grandma sees them.
Then: We packed our lunches full of the best candy the next day to show off to our friends.
Now: We pack our bra into our purse… and avoid our friends on the Walk of Shame home.