(Not a) Newsflash: Ashlee Simpson Is Not Talented

To put it bluntly: Melrose Place version 2.0 is a train wreck. And who are we (and the producers) going to point the finger of blame at? Ashlee Simpson, of course. Booed off the stage and now off the set, the girl can’t seem to catch a break. But is anyone really surprised?

We’ve all seen it.  The singer-turned-actor crossover move that has critics telling stars time and time again not to quit their day jobs. But in Ashlee Simpson’s case, I’m not sure what day job she has to fall back on. Now that she has been fired from Melrose Place, I think Ashlee should take a long look at her life’s work before she makes her next career move.

Let’s face facts: the girl can’t sing. We all remember when she blamed acid reflux for her Milli-Vanilli-esque stunt on Saturday Night Live in 2004. I think the entire world breathed a sigh of relief when Ashlee claimed she might never be able to sing again. (Could she ever?) What happened to that? I could have done without the “Bittersweet World” album. Me and the three other people who purchased it demand our money back. (And my dignity having just admitted to buying that…)

So perhaps singing wasn’t her forte. In a bold move, Ashlee decided to try her hand at acting. Melrose Place was a big undertaking, I give her that much. But honestly, while she may have been promising in her small role on 7th Heaven, whatever talent she had then seems to have dissipated in a sea of plastic surgery and hair extensions. Besides, if Heather Locklear says she’s gotta go, then the girl’s gotta go.

But the good news here is, no one really watches Melrose Place anyway. If you’re going to crash and burn, for the millionth time, at least the whole world isn’t going to be there to point and laugh at you. Even Jessica called the show crap. But then again, what does she know? Her last acting job was a movie called “Major Movie Star.”

I’m deeply sorry for your loss, Ashlee. It looks like plastic surgery isn’t a career-saver after all.

We’ve All Been There: Sexiled
We’ve All Been There: Sexiled
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