It all happens so quickly.
You are out a bar/party with your girls, looking amazing, because, honestly, what CollegeCandy girl doesn’t look amazing? You see him, he sees you and – boom – you start talking. Talking turns into flirting, flirting turns into so-bad-they’re-cute pick up lines and soon he’s buying you a drink. Maybe it’s the vodka, maybe it’s the way he keeps finding an excuse to touch you’re arm, but you’re smitten and your night just got a whole lot better. The number exchange comes next and the cute-textathon begins.
He’s sweet and witty and you look forward to the daily flirtation and then – out of nowhere – it just stops. No more morning musings. No more responses to your adorable messages. Nada.
Turns out, homeboy just isn’t that into you.
After that lovely realization comes the packages of Oreo cookies, the Friends marathons, the comfy pajama pants, and the over- analyzing. It doesn’t matter that nothing ever really came from this; getting rejected sucks and it hurts and you really thought this guy was gonna be the guy. But you were wrong. And now you’re 3lbs heavier, lonely and hating yourself.
While getting over a guy should be as easy as getting into him, it never is. But you deserve more than nights spent alone in front of the mirror wondering what’s wrong with you. Because there’s nothing wrong with you. Remind yourself of that and follow these 5 little steps and you’ll be over that turd in no time.
1. “Delete Him”– This is challenging because in some instances, and almost all of mine, we all hold onto the hope that it might just work out. That he’s been super busy and just hasn’t had time to send a text or two. But let’s be real: it won’t, he’s not, and you must, as hard as it is, delete him from your life. That means cell phone, Facebook, gchat, etc. All of it. Get rid of him. Don’t leave yourself any opportunity for a drunk dial/text/very public Facebook wall post.
2. “Replace Him”– Get the speakers out and turn up Beyonce. Remember, “you can have another him in a minute.” He’s nothing special, and he is definitely replaceable. You’re in college, honey; there are plenty of really attractive and intelligent fish out there, so jump back into that pond.
3. “If he didn’t have time for you, don’t give him time.”– Stop sitting around and pondering the details. Gather up your friends, go out and have fun. Distraction is the best way to move on, and all the time you waste thinking about him is all potential time you could be using to find someone who will return your calls.
4. “Refocus on You.”– Throughout every boy chase, I feel like girls always lose focus of who they are. Remember that you were awesome before him, and you will be after him. Stand in front of the mirror and remind yourself of all your good qualities, rediscover what makes you happy and do it.
5. “Make a hate list”– It’s okay to be bitter for a bit. In fact, hate is a very important part of getting over someone. Take out some paper and make a list of his less than finer qualities. Be brutal. It will not only make you feel really good, but you now have a working list of things to avoid in the future.
We only have 4 years in college (Editor’s Note: Trust me, it goes by way too fast!) and it is not OK to waste most of that pining away for a guy who’s not worth it. So get him out of your phone and out of your mind fast. It is possible.