Olsenboye: Mary Kate and Ashley’s Failed Attempt at Budget Fashion

If I could raid any two celebrity closets, it would have to be Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen’s. (Actually, they probably share a closet so I guess I would only need to sneak into one, right?) Oversized sweaters (on top of more oversized sweaters), heavy rings that weigh down their fingers (all ten of them), the highest Louboutin heels and the brightest red lipstick.

Sigh. I think I’m drooling.

How many times have I tried their look but always walked out the door looking like a clown? (Actually, on second thought, let’s not talk about the amount of times I’ve done that.) The truth is, no matter how hard I try, I never look like Mary-Kate or Ashley. It’s such a letdown. And while some people think their style is beyond bizarre-o, I happen to think they know more about fashion than half the “fashion designers” out there (are you reading, Lauren Conrad?).

This is why I was super excited when I found out they were creating a line for JCPenney. After all, clothing from The Row and Elizabeth and James are way too much weight on the wallet. Plus, did you hear about their genius marketing strategy for the new line, which they call Olsenboye? The twins traveled through New York City on a hot pink bus, showing off their line and handing out cupcakes! I repeat, a hot pink truck with cupcakes! I. Want. Their. Lives. But seriously, though.

So since I couldn’t be in the Big Apple for the trucks, I decided to bake a dozen cupcakes and look at Olsenboye online.

The cupcakes were great, but the line for JCP? Well…not so much. I hate to say anything negative about my terrific two-some (who once coined my favorite catch-phrase: “You got it, dude!”),  but this line does not do their brilliance justice! Sure, the line has a couple of cute over-sized tees, stylish flannel shirts and blazers, but it pretty much ends there. And “there” still looks cheap and watered down.

Am I missing something? Where are the grandpa-styled cardigans that we see the twins prancing around in? What about some trendy leggings or vintage necklaces that we just need to add to our collection?

I know that this line will never be as luxe as their others or even close to anything they wear, but I also know it’s possible to create something a lot better than this on a small budget. Even the Mossimo line at Target has more options! This just seems like an insult; like MK and Ashley just signed their names away without giving those of us on a budget a second thought. We may not be able to afford a $300 shirt, but that doesn’t mean we want to look like wanna-be trend-setters.

I was pumped to be able to dress like Mary-Kate and Ashley for a good price, but now I’m just even more broken up than when I (majorly) fail at putting my own pieces together in an attempt to pull of their boho-chic look. I hate to say it, really I do, but this line is no better than Lauren Conrad’s attempt at designing for Kohls.

In fact, I’m not sure it’s much better than her attempt at writing a novel, either.

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