Let’s Ring in 2010 Without These D-Listers

Give me your wardrobe and go away, Kardashians!

Every time I turn on the television, pick up a magazine or check my Twitter and favorite gossip websites, there are certain celebrities that just won’t go away. They’re always doing something idiotic or annoying and they make sure we all know about it. These particular celebs have taken over 2009 and I’m not about to let them ruin 2010 for me.

Here are the top 10 celebrities I could do without in 2010:

1. Lindsay Lohan – We all get it. You have daddy issues. He won’t support you. And by you I mean your addiction to prescription drugs, cocaine and spray-on tans. You’ve drained this girl’s pity dry after your 100th failed attempt at rehab. Get clean or be gone, you orange oompa loompa.

2. The Gosselins – I just don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive you for what you’ve done to those adorable kids. You should both be ashamed of yourselves. Maddie and Cara act more mature than you have this past year. And I don’t care how many times you change your hairstyle, Kate, I’m over you.

3. Kanye West – I’ve loathed you for years, Mr. West. Remember this humble quote: “I realize that my place and position in history is that I will go down as the voice of this generation, of this decade, I will be the loudest voice.”  You certainly were the loudest voice at the VMA’s this year, sir. And you will go down in history as an arrogant, SOB. Oopsies.

4. Taylor Swift – As much as I could do without Kanye, I could also take a break from you, lovely Taylor. You really racked up the awards this year. Good for you, but I think you’re a bit overrated.

5. Spencer Pratt – You call yourself a villain, but I just think you’re lame. I laughed when I watched Stephen Baldwin baptize you in the jungle river on “I’m a Celebrity. Get Me Out of Here!” Your holy makeover didn’t seem to take, did it? You deserve a swift punch to the face.  Or the nads. Or both.

6. Katherine Heigl – I love the girl to death, but she just has nothing nice to say! All she does is whine, whine, whine about the parts and roles she is so generously given and I can’t take it anymore. You’re pissing everyone off Katherine, and as sad as I (and a majority of the male gender) will be to see you go, you may have dug your own grave for 2010.

7. The Kardashians, all of em’ – I still don’t know why you’re all famous. I think they can make a show about my life and have it be more meaningful. I don’t care that you’re taking on Miami. I’m taking on things of my own, so I’d kindly appreciate it if you would stop terrorizing my television!

8. Dr. Phil – I have no reason for this. You just irk me. Good riddance.

9. Perez Hilton – I didn’t want you around in ’07, ’08, or ’09. I think everyone can handle 2010 without your Microsoft Painted penises and Lady-Gaga-ass-kissing ways.

10. Ashlee Simpson – I really thought we’d be done with you in 2006 when a stadium full of football fans booed you off the stage. But no; somehow you’re still around. Sure, it’s with a completely new face and a monthly rotation of hair color, but it’s still you. And you still have no talent. Take that guyliner-wearing hubby of yours and go. away.

Looking Forward: The Good and The Bad Coming In 2010
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