Much Like Santa, Your G-spot Isn’t Real

Stop searching. It's not there.

If 2010 has taught me anything so far it’s that eating greasy Thai noodles for four days straight will make you fatter. And if this year has taught me two things, it’s also that infamous and elusive G-spot is a sham.


Yes, it’s true. A recent study of about 1,800 women has concluded that the G-spot is one big, fat lie.

Upon first reading this study I was shocked, appalled, cursing Cosmo and their 500 tips per month on maximizing something that doesn’t exist… and subconsciously reaching toward my nether regions. From Santa Clause, the Easter Bunny, and the Coach purse you purchased at a kiosk, how many lies can one woman take?

But the more I thought about it, I realized how reassuring it was to know that all that time I spend in bed looking at my watch waiting for the Big O that never comes (no pun intended) has never actually been my fault. Or the fault of the man lying there with me.

While this study is somewhat disheartening (like that moment when you realized the Tooth Fairy was actually the rotund man you call “dad”) and definitely under a lot of scrutiny, to me it’s nothing but good news. Finally there is an answer to too many women’s concerns. Finally we can stop wasting our time highlighting key passages in the latest Cosmo as we go on yet another monthly scavenger hunt for our g-spot! Finally we can tell that “friend” of ours to focus on the pleasure parts we know exist and take a one way ticket to O-Town (and I’m not talking about the boy band) sans the Mapquest directions.

This study may be bad news for some (mostly whoever is writing books like these), but not so much for the rest of us. After all, knowing Santa wasn’t real didn’t stop the presents from coming, right?

The Dating Double Standard
The Dating Double Standard
  • 10614935101348454