Your St. Paddy’s Day Survival Guide

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St. Patrick’s Day is a college student’s dream come true.  Well, I feel like any excuse to drink green beer and wear a “Kiss Me I’m Irish” pin is a dream come true.  I’m not Irish at all, and can respect St. Patrick’s Day and all it has to offer.  Especially since last year, I managed to sport a neon green wig in public all day long and closed the night out ordering hash browns at Perkins at 3AM.

The only issue I’m having is that St.Patty’s day lands on a Wednesday this year.  You know what that means: time to figure out how to party and go to class.  Ultimately, you can’t let a little thing called “your education/future” ruin your St. Patty’s Day experience, so I’m here to help you get it all. Because if I can do the Irish Jig with a leprechaun on top of a bar (true story) anything is possible, people.

Get Ahead on Thursday’s Reading
If you want to dedicate St. Patrick’s Day entirely to drinking green beer, you are going to want to get ahead on all your work for Thursday. Buckle down and do that reading on Monday or Tuesday, so you don’t have to think about anything come Kegs & Eggs at 6am on Wednesday.

Make Sure You Have Everything You Need
When you have to juggle class and fun, you’ve gotta be prepared, so pack that bag the night before! Things to include: a toothbrush so you can brush off all of the green beer stains on your teeth before class, a change of clothes (just in case you spill beer on your shirt before lecture), breath mints, a bottle of water to sip on during class, eye makeup remover, and mascara. Pack the correct books and notes for each class.  Oh, and make sure pack a list of local taxi numbers.  If I could dub a holiday dedicated to bar hopping, St. Patty’s Day would win the prize.  This way, you can do it safely.

Load Up on the Carbs in the morning
Kegs and eggs? Sounds great (cuz it rhymes), but you are going to need to fill up on a little more if you don’t wanna boot before noon. Load up on the carbohydrates to avoid a crash mid-afternoon, and pack a ton of Kashi bars for an afternoon protein/carb boost. (This is perfect if you’ve got a 2pm lecture you need to attend – use the time to refuel!) Oh, and if you can, drink some water in between alcoholic drinks. This will not only slow you down so you make it through till the late night parties, but it will keep you from looking like a hot, sloppy mess in class.

Set cell-phone alarms
Chances are, after the first five beers, the last thing on your mind will be hustling to class on time. And then, five hours into the St. Patty’s experience, you won’t even remember what time class starts.  So before you get the party started, set some alarms (loud ones) on your phone so you know when you gotta put down the car bomb and pick up the books. And if you need backup, find a sober friend now (you may have to look high and low) to keep tabs on you and make sure you get you where you need to be.

Schedule out your day in advance
This way, you can get the most partying time between classes (which is a number one St. Patty’s day concern).  Which bars do you want to go to?  Who can drive? Where are we meeting and when? Where will everyone be after I finish that 3-hour lecture? Figure these things out now so you don’t waste precious party time tracking people down come Wednesday.

Take a Five-Hour Energy
I’ve heard these things are the bomb.com and if there were ever a reason I’d need a little bottle of energy, juggling a day of drinking with 4 hours of classes is it.

Buy a Green Wig
If I have ever done anything correctly for St. Patty’s Day, it was buying a green wig.  I understand this may have nothing to do with surviving a long day of drinking, but I can guarantee if you are sifting through newly added Facebook pictures during lecture next week and a gem pops up with you sporting that green wig, you will be happy you got one.

COLLEGECANDY Writer
COLLEGECANDY Writer
If I could eat toast and watch Shark Week all day, every day, my life would exceed perfection status.
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