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The Weirdest of the Weird at American Apparel

Everyone’s got a place in their heart and closet for American Apparel. Lord knows about 60% of my tshirt drawer is made up of their deliciously well worn v-necks. And who doesn’t love those amazing dresses that go 12 ways?

But everyone who’s ever been into an American Apparel store has also noticed the total ridiculousness that fills their overstuffed racks. Shiny gold unitards? Really?

On a trip there recently (to pick up some hot pink leggings for a costume party – standard), I found myself WTF-ing from the front of the store to the back. I mean, a lace leotard? Who are they making these things for?

Who needs a hood on a swimsuit? I mean, you’re pretty much prepared to get wet if you’re wearing one, right?

Not only would this be extremely itchy (especially in a fey key areas), but could you imagine the underwear lines in this thing??

Um, this little guy is unisex.

Unless you’re starring in a Jane Fonda workout video from 1982, this is socially irresponsible.

Perfect for: church, meeting his parents, or turning tricks on shady street corners in dangerous parts of town. You decide.

Do you have a dance competition coming up? Do you want to learn to tap? Do you like the way swamp ass looks in a pair of sateen pants? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you still should not own these pants.


If the look on this model’s face says one thing it’s, “All this semi-nudity makes me uncomfortable.” Oddly enough, I’m making the same face.

The Morning After: Rebels Without a Cause
The Morning After: Rebels Without a Cause
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