In high school I was a boyfriend kind of girl. I was never single for long, but instead jumped from guy to guy. I went through every relationship possible. I was in love, I was out of love, I was in lust, I was in good relationships and in not so good relationships. I dated guys that treated me like I was everything, and guys that treated me like I was nothing.
Regardless, I was never really single. So when I came to college, I wanted things to be different. I didn’t want to be tied down in a relationship or be known as some guy’s girlfriend. Instead, I wanted to be independent and on my own (and I also wanted to have a lot of fun). And in the four years that I’ve been at college, I’ve been able to be and do all of those things.
Unlike a lot of people, I have never seriously dated anyone or had a boyfriend in college.
Some may find this confusing, weird, or depressing. To me, I just find it amazing. There are so many pros to going through college sans boyfriend. Mostly, I’ve had the best time getting to know myself. I’ve figured out who I am, without any relation to some guy. When I was high school, I often determined my worth by if I was in a relationship or not. But in college I’ve grown and developed without being a girlfriend. I’ve lived up to my expectations and no one else’s.
Okay, so maybe if I had a boyfriend I would have had a steadier stream of consistent sex during college, but that hasn’t stopped me from getting my kicks. I’ve been able to meet lots of guys and have great guy friends, a feat that doesn’t always happen when you have a boyfriend over your shoulder.
And obviously there have been nights when I’ve been lonely and really just wanted someone to spoon and watch a romantic comedy with, but overall I’ve been incredibly happy.
I haven’t felt any less loved. Instead, being single has allowed me to make the most amazing friends in the world and create deep, solid friendships that may not have been possible if I was preoccupied with a BF. I’ve never had to split my time between boyfriend and friends, which many of you know is a huge deal when you’re in a relationship.
I truly feel lucky to have been boyfriend-free over these past four years. And now, unlike many couples weeks before graduation, I’m not making my after school plans based on someone else. I will move to the city I want because I want to, not because I need to be close to my college sweetheart. I don’t have to compromise anything and I’m thankful for that.
College is almost over and I’ve been single (and lovin’ it). And although I may be graduating single, I am certainly not graduating alone. And now, as I get closer to graduation day and the next phase of my life, I think I’m finally ready to be a girlfriend again…but not until I’ve settled down in my next city of choice of course.