In elementary school, I made friends in the sandbox – sharing my buckets and shovels. In middle school, I made friends by being that new girl from California living in a small Georgia town. In high school, I made friends by joining the newspaper and writing about my misfortunes of high school dating in an all-too honest column. In college, I made friends and bonded with them over two hour road-trips, Britney Spears’ Greatest Hits, and gas station food. Looking back, the whole process of making friends has always seemed easy, but now what?
I’m out of college, on the opposite side of the country, living with my dad who thinks he is starring in his own comedy sitcom, and completely alone. Those closest to me are elsewhere. My boyfriend is on the opposite coast. My best friend is in the middle of Atlanta. My dearest, bestie ever is living in South Africa! My college friends are strewn across the USA. And here I am, writing about how to make friends at 22 years of age without an inkling of what to do.
In all honesty, I’m actually surprised with the sudden need to make friends. Going into my senior year of college, the girls I thought were my friends for life broke up with me. The friend break-up was a major wake-up call! Although it ended up being one of the best things that happened to me, and I was really lucky to get out of that situation, I will admit – it made me very cautious and guarded about people and their intentions. During senior year, the word “friendship” was completely out of my vocabulary.
But just like with any break-up, there comes a point when you feel ready to give it another go. I think I’m ready to find a friend or someone out here that I can hang out with, shop with, and do friend things with. Even though I’m incredibly busy, I can’t spend all of my time working, writing, studying for the LSAT, and never have social interaction. Oh, and as much as I love spending time with my dad, there is only so much time you can spend with a 50-year-old chain smoking business man that frequently quotes Judge Judy.
Although it hasn’t been quite a full month on this post-grad journey, I will admit that making friends has become a priority of something I want in my life. I’m in this new place so I think it’s only natural to want to spend time with other people and make new memories, especially now that I’m out of college and everything is so different than it was two months ago when I was still on campus.
But what am I supposed to do to meet people? Go to the bar? Although I love Snooki from The Jersey Shore, I have to admit – I’m not looking for a fist-pumping shore girl to hang out with. And the whole idea of a bar makes things seem kinda sleezy. I want to make friends, not be accosted by sketchy guys. Also, I rather have quality – not quantity – and I don’t know what kind of quality people I will be finding under flashing lights, techno beats, and the help of a few vodka collins’! Plus, how does one make friends at a bar? Do I need a pick-up line? Do I ask for her number?
This is making me contemplate putting up one of those personal ads on Craigslist – “In Search of a Friend.” How creepy, right? Maybe I could even add an application for people to fill out, if they want to be my friend and then I can rank the applicants based upon their responses to my friend application?
OK, obviously, Craigslist is not the answer!
Maybe, if I ever find a job, I will meet people my own age. But until then, it looks like my best friend will continue to be me. And my pops.
Really, what’s a post-college girl to do?