Gossip Cheat Sheet: Hungry for Some Hollywood Hoop-La

As Hollywood stirs the pot of gossip-shaped noodles, I’m eating spoonful after spoonful. Hollywood always gives us the generous opportunity to lift all of our own emotional flounders and replace them with the train-wrecks and idiots overpopulating the City of Angels.  This week, however, was rather chill for (most) celebs.  Reese Witherspoon went shopping wearing floral and drank iced tea with her daughter, Sienna and Jude vacationed in Spain, Vanessa Hudgens was spotted shopping in a floppy hat and Blake Lively applied lip gloss in public (!).

Awww, the bittersweet summer in Hollyweird slowly coming to a blissful end.

Don’t worry though. A lull in August isn’t completely a bust.  Here is what’s goin down in celeb town (sorry, it was too tempting).

I’ll Take a Big Mac

Prop 8 Is Overturned in California and Celebs Tweet Their Phrase! Celebrity Twitter accounts exploded when Prop 8 was overturned in California.  A few of my personal favorites of course involved Lady Gaga talking about bubbles and dreams. @LadyGaga: At the moments notice of PROP 8 DEATH I instantly began to write music. BUBBLE DREAMS FOREVER! FULL EQUALITY! THIS IS JUST THE BEGININNG!

Leo Granted Restraining Order. Against crazy-town Aretha Wilson who attacked the Titanic heartthrob with a beer bottle in 2005.  Attacked with a beer bottle? Was it one of those new plastic Michelob Lights? Did it bounce right off his flawless face? I kid Leo, I kid. The bottle was broken and he needed stitches for the incident!  And Wilson’s bail has been raised from $60,000 to $150,000 because of concern about her willingness to get back to court.  I’m just wondering what he could have done to that 40-year-old women to receive wrath like that? I mean come on, he gave us Jack Dawson. Where’s the abuse-motive in that, Miss Wilson??

Hilary Duffster Pushes Wedding With Slice-of-Hockey-Heaven Mike Comrie to Next Week! Like woah, the wedding bells in Duff’s ears must be giving her a migraine because a new report says they will be prancing down the aisle August 14th (as in next week).  They also recently purchased their freak-nest right next door to homegirls Britney Spears and Gwen Stefani. Wait, is Duff hearing wedding bells or babies crying?

Bristol Announces She Got Played by Levi and They Break It Off. Again. A week after an engagement announcement. Relationship expert announced the couple was “very immature.” Hey, I’m a relationship expert too and I say, “Levi is a fame whore!”

Rosie O’ Donnell Get’s Her Own Show on Oprah TV. Oprah claims it will be “playful and energetic.”  No name of the show or debut date has been announced yet.  But Rosie says the show will be a “single topic, hour long show about life, love and laughter.” Sweet, Rosie O’ LiveLoveLaugh. Very Sweet.

Small Fry Please

Rihanna Poses With Young Fans Dressed As Clowns. Rihanna left her hotel in Toronto, Canada to pose with fans dressed up as clowns. This is weird, Rihanna, and I don’t get it, but kudos to you for not being afraid!  In other news, watch her new video featuring a red wig, Eminem and Megan Fox. That’s a lot.

Emma Watson Chops Off All Her Tresses; Calls It Liberating. Although I feel like chopping off my hair would end up like one of those Sour Patch Kid commercials, Watson had a different outlook.  She claims chopping her hair off was the most liberating thing she’d ever done.  And kudos for that, Emma Watson. (Speaking of which, Kudos are so good. I’m totally jonesing for one now.)  Lindsay Lohan thinks wearing her leggings line in jail is liberating, so keep up the good work on being a normal teenager.

Justin Bieber Visits Band Camp. Hold on to your kicks, kids. Justin Timberlake didn’t visit my art camp when I was in middle school, dag nabbit! JBeebs, however, has other plans and visited the Seminole High School in Florida as part of the Best Buy and Grammy Foundation for music programs. Cute and positively community driven. Awesome, Beebs!

Heidi Montag Tweets About Missing Lauren Conrad. Right when I thought Montag was giving her plead to become BFFs with Conrad an RIP label, she tweets about watching old Hills episodes and missing Audrina (but Lauren the most). Make the visuals of Heidi attempting Operation: Crying dissolve.

Katie Holmes ‘Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark’ Trailer is Released. Let’s play a game; who’s more scared? You of that trailer, or Holmes of her acting career?

To sign off, I’m going to have to leave with a nugget of hotness to freeze-frame in your mind and file for later; Bradley Cooper has nice calves.

5 Things You Should Never Do On Facebook
5 Things You Should Never Do On Facebook
  • 10614935101348454