[It’s pretty obvious that the average CollegeCandy reader has some very strong opinions. Opinions that she likes to share with everyone on the site. We love a strong woman (unless she happens to be charging at us with her fists raised), so we thought we’d give her a real forum to discuss her thoughts, feelings, and perspectives. Every Friday I’ll be featuring a hot topic (like fandom!) and leaving it up to you, the readers, to duke it out. So, read it and get your debate on in the comments section below!]
We’ve all killed a few hours (*cough*Calculus*cough*) imagining that amazing guy that would somehow walk into our lives – you know, the one with the suave of George Clooney, the charm of Joseph Gordon-Levitt and the abs of Ryan Kwanten (hello, Jason Stackhouse!) – and magically turn all those microwave-ramen-days into a romantic comedy dream. Turns out though, most of us actually believe he exists.
OK, maybe not quite as awesome as we dreamed, but still, according to a new, poll two-thirds of us believe that our soul mate is out there and that we’ll find him some day.
On the one hand, I totally get that. Assuming that you didn’t spend your formative years as part of a remote tribe in the depths of the Amazon (and probably even if you did), you were probably raised on movies, TV shows and books filled with epic love stories. And if all of those quirky girls can find THE guy who will love them and make life a fairy tale, why shouldn’t someone nice and normal (mumbles) like me be able to do it too. Sure, we realize it’s not going to play out exactly like the movies, but it’s not really the big kiss-in-the-rain-to-the-tune-of-a-Top-4o-love-song scenes that matter, it’s the love. Moreover, those stories always make it seem like the girl who “settles” – who picks a nice, smart, handsome guy who loves her but isn’t “the one” – is making a huge mistake and ruining her happiness forever. No, we’re not all four years-old, we know that all of those tales aren’t real life, but they do on a subconscious level, form our ideas about what love should be.
But then there’s that pesky little reality problem we all have to live with. See, it turns out that people who believe in the soulmate thing and apply that to their relationships are 150% more likely to get divorced. Ouch! The problem is, in a world with roughly 6.5 billion people, even if we all really do have a soul mate, the odds of finding that person would be crazy small (I’d do the math, but like I said before, I had other abs on my mind during those classes). It also inherently means that most people who get married are probably married to someone who’s not “the one” – and by that virtue, are taking up someone else’s “one” – and that those marriages are somehow less meaningful. The soul mate seems like a romantic idea, but when you put it into perspective, it’s actually just heart-crushingly depressing.
What say ye, ladies? (Why did that go all medieval? I have no idea) Do you believe that someday your prince will come? Or is that rom-com stuff all a little blown out of proportion? Duke it out!