Thanks for The Snoozefest, Taylor Swift

So if you watched the VMAs last night, you saw Taylor Swift’s yawn-inducing performance.  When she took the stage and that reel of last year’s run-in with Kanye began to run, I was probably thinking the same thing as you.  Wait, you were actually surprised to find out she wrote a song about someone who did her wrong?  Right, because she’s never tried that one before.  (Ahem: Tears on My Guitar, You’re Not Sorry, Picture to Burn, Should’ve Said No…shall I go on?)

I’ll be honest, while blond country-pop crossover phenomenon was up there strumming away, I waited on the edge of my seat for Kanye to pop out (also barefoot) and join her for a few notes. And after I realized that wasn’t going to happen, I spent the rest of that dreadful performance thinking of the other great artists out there who should have been in the spotlight instead.

Pink
Talk about one talented lady who was totally overshadowed at this year’s VMAs.  Not only is she tough stuff, Pink has been belting out tunes and hanging from tightropes and doing all crazy stunts lately.  I would have loved to see her tear it up on MTV with something a little more exciting than strumming a guitar on a chair.  You know she would have delivered.

Katy Perry
Granted she did get a couple nominations, but sadly Ms. Perry didn’t walk away with any moon men.  Putting aside the fact that I’ve been completely obsessed with Teenage Dream lately, I think she would have put on a great end-of-summer performance.  Maybe a cameo from Russell Brand as back-up dancer or a duet with Snoop to California Gurls… Would have been pretty amazing.

Miley Cyrus
Oh wait, JK.

The Black Eyed Peas
Seriously, what happened to them?  Did I miss the break-up memo?  Since Will.I.Am has been celebrating a hit with Usher this summer, it seems like the rest of the group has been sitting back.  The VMAs would have been a great opportunity to have the whole gang come back with a stellar performance.  They could have introduced a new song, gotten crazy with the pyro, or Fergie could have worn a hideous ensemble while doing backflips.  I mean, I could be making fun of her camel toe right now instead of hating on Taylor Swift.  Totes better.

The Black Keys
Oh, how I lust for these guys’ music.  It’s indie done right.  They won for Breakthrough Video and I certainly think a stage performance would have gone so well.  While Taylor put me to sleep while she waxed poetic on Kanye West’s morals, The Black Keys could have kicked a little ass and rocked out.  And if you haven’t seen the video in full, watch it and tell me that little kid who “smells like ranch dressing” isn’t the cutest ever.

We’ve All Been There: Does He Like Me?!
We’ve All Been There: Does He Like Me?!
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