Friday Faves: Are You Just Not That Into Him?

Things Girls Do For a Date:

1) Try on everything in our closets, which, might I add, usually results in sweating like we just ran a marathon, all while ranting to ourselves about how we have NO clothes (minus the messy heap that was once our closet).

God forbid we should be too overdressed, too trendy, too slutty, or look too high-maintenance. Yet, we still need that perfect ‘fit that makes us look adorable… so that he will like us.

2) Email our friends 15 times on Date Day. “Can I wear a dress?” “What do I talk about?” “What’s our code word if it goes bad and I need an excuse to leave?” “What about the awkward silences?” “What if I’m not funny?” and our friends write us back and assure us that we are fabu and he will obviously like us.

3) Then the date rolls around and we sit up straight, eat fatty food so we aren’t one of those “Ano girls who don’t eat,” smile so much that our cheeks hurt (I really wonder how Ms. America does it) and bring our A game to the table.

Why? So he will like us. Like us and want to call/email us. And we will inevitably spend our next few days staring at our gmail inboxes and cell phones. Never thinking we would be so bummed out to get an email telling us of a MAJOR sale.

While that is all peachy (usually nothing excites us more than knowing MJ aviators are ½ off) right now this is soo not the new email we were hoping for.

And then, we get the call, we date the guy for a while—he likes us. Just what we wanted and we live happily ever after. The End. Right?

Well at least until we realize two months later that WE can’t stand THEM.

Why is it that as chicks, we go out and spend our energy trying to get the guy to like us without ever taking into account how we feel about them? Every time one of my friends gets home from a date, I turn into Dear Abby (or in some cases the dude from “He’s Just Not That into You”) and analyze every oh-so-scintillating moment of her date:

 

Friend: “And then, he said ‘Oh really? I didn’t like that movie’ and then I laughed. What do you think that means? Why did I laugh? Do you think he likes me? Did I f- it up?”

Me (half rolling my eyes and half sympathizing with her [and all girls’] pathetic tendency to over-analyze every breath she took on the date): “Okay, but did you like him?”

Friend: “I think so?”

I never really thought about the fact that we do this until a friend was prepping me for a date and told me that the most important thing was not to flip my hair and say cute things and show off my cleave to get him to like me, but to pay attention if I liked him.

So my lovely CC readers, I’m passing this thought on to you. Really think about it. We are so caught up on “He’s Just Not That in to You” when in reality, maybe you just aren’t into him? Don’t overlook the fact that talking to your martini would provide more interesting conversation or that he hasn’t asked you about yourself once. Those are important things in determining your feelings, and your feelings for him should most definitely be determined.

Think about that next time you’re having an anxiety attack over how you have nothing to wear for your next date…

[This story was originally posted by Jill – University of Wisconsin]

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