[We scoured the country to find the ultimate sorority girl to share her sisterly expertise with you. After reading through tons of applications followed by hours Facebook-stalking all the candidates (which proved difficult thanks to FB’s privacy settings….), we found her. She gave you the lowdown on rush and the rules of the sorority date party. And now that you’re sitting pretty in your new house, she’s got a few things to say about sisterly love…. or a lack thereof.]
Sorority recruitment can be many things: fun, intense, scary, adventurous, and exciting – but it can also be brutal. Warning: Expect tears. While many girls will end up in their dream house, there are plenty of potential new members that will not get their first choice house and some girls who won’t get in a house at all!
Sorority recruitment is an opportunity of a lifetime that every girl should experience BUT here’s what to do when things don’t quite go your way, every step of the way.
Right from the start: Of course every sorority recruitment is different, but I will use my university as an example! The PNMs at Purdue visit 15 chapters in just 2 days and narrow it down to their favorite 11. If those 11 chapters also like those women who picked them (mutual selection process) then the women will return to those 11 chapters. BUT if someone happens to love a chapter and they aren’t feeling the vibe, women are released, hence the tears (see above).
Don’t sweat being cut this round- it’s perfectly normal. And let’s face it, with only 10 minute conversations, you didn’t have any real connection with anyone during this round; you just liked the sorority décor and thought the girls had on uber trendy shoes. It’s important to know the girls at this chapter DON’T hate you and you absolutely should not take it personally; first round releases are normally done based on grades or because every chapter has to make cuts. It’s just the way the process works. And it does work.
You’re halfway there: So it’s been a couple rounds now and you have it narrowed down to about 5 houses, but you get your return slip back and your must-have house apparently sees you as a must-not-have. Be calm. Trust the system. You still have other great houses that want you! Think about it this way: why would you ever want to be a part of that organization if they cut you? I heard girls say in my rush group, “If I could just go back in there one more time, I could prove to them _______.” But you don’t want to have to prove anything- be yourself. If they don’t like you for who you are, or see how awesome you are already, then you don’t want to be a part of that sorority anyway! Be positive and always continue on with the recruitment process!
They led you on: At this point, getting released from a chapter when they are on your top 3 list just seems wrong- I know firsthand, it happened to me. You’re furious at the system and the girls who got through to the next round, and you are racking your brain to figure out what you could have done differently to beat them. Worn a cuter dress? Higher heels? Told your rusher how great her outfit was even though it was so 2008? The truth is, we will probably never know.
But that’s ok – because we DO know that there are chapters that invited you back and are so excited about YOU and they want YOU as a new member in their sorority! My advice is to definitely stick with it, and at least go through with the last day of recruitment. You might be surprised, and following through doesn’t mean you have to officially commit to a accepting a bid. If you’re not feeling it, that’s fine. At least you tried.
Continuous and informal recruitment are also options! I would advise you to make an appointment or drop by your school’s Panhellenic office to learn about your different options!
What else do YOU want to know about sorority recruitment? Let’s talk the ups and downs of sorority recruitment!