We’ve All Been There: Waiting to Work Out

We’re well into another new school year and to honor that, we at CollegeCandy are bringing back the fan-favorite series, “We’ve All Been There.”  (We tried to get another national holiday/long weekend for you guys but it’s way harder than we thought so this will have to do.) Every week, Lauren – University of Michigan will comment on the common experiences all college women share – like procrastinating or using the not-so-private bathrooms. Read, relate, cringe and enjoy.

After finishing another long day of classes (a whole 3 hours!), you head home to grab a quick snack and go to the gym. You don’t even let yourself sit down or get comfortable, knowing that getting near that couch – even for a moment – means you would never get up again. You have a ton of reading to do, but you must squeeze in that daily workout.

You throw on a pair of workout pants, squeeze into a sports bra, grab your iPod and a bottle of water and make your way to the gym.

You play your cardio mix as you walk, pumping you up for the big workout ahead. It’s gonna be a long run, or maybe 45 minutes on the elliptical.

When you get to the gym you realize that you weren’t the only one with this plan today. The gym is packed. You make your way to the cardio room and notice a short line has already formed for both the treadmills and the ellipticals.

So you wait.

As you stand there, losing any motivation you may have had for a long, sweaty workout, you look over at the machines to see if anyone is close to finishing. That is when you spot her.

She’s wearing crisp, tight yoga pants and a sports bra. Not under a shirt, but as a shirt. Her hair is perfectly straight and her face is made up for a night at the bars. And she is on the phone. Her feet are barely moving – god forbid she should break a sweat and ruin her eyeliner – as she discusses her evening plans (quite loudly) with whomever is on the other end of the call.

15 minutes go by. The rest of the girls on the ellipticals are still working hard – sweating, breathing heavy, staring at Cell Phone girl. And she continues chatting.

You sigh loudly and obviously, shifting your weight from side to side. Maybe, you think to yourself, this girl doesn’t realize people are waiting to get a real workout.  She looks at you.  And keeps on talking.

All of that energy you had stored up for your workout is surging through you. You want to walk over and ask her nicely (“Bitch, can you get off that machine so someone who wants to actually USE it can get on?!) to get off the machine, but you don’t. Instead, you stand there and stew.

Another 5 minutes go by and, finally, she hangs up the call and stops pedaling. “Thank god,” you think to yourself.  You start walking towards her elliptical when you realize that someone else is already there. And has struck up a conversation with her. She stands on the elliptical – not moving – and chats it up with her muscley friend.

Another elliptical opens up and you finally get your workout started. It is another 20 minutes before Ms. Thang gets up and leaves the gym, not a bead of sweat dripping from her flawless face.

She walks by your machine on the way out. “Yeah, I’m leaving the gym,” she says into her Crackberry. “I’m so tired from my workout!”

Fuming, you pedal faster.

We’ve all been there. And we’ve wanted to throw some hand weights at her too.

Dina Lohan: The Toxic Parent
Dina Lohan: The Toxic Parent
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