Gossip Cheat Sheet: Hollywood Falls in Love

Maybe in an attempt to make up for all the cheating and divorcing that went on this past year, half of Hollywood seemed to get engaged over the holidays. I guess they really let the Christmas spirit get to them. Either way, congrats celebs. I only hope that at least one of these couples will still be around come 2012.

Poppin’ Champage, New Years Eve VIP Style

1. Natalie Portman is knocked up. And she’s getting married! Hey, at least they’re doing this the right way. Natalie got engaged to her choreographer from Black Swan, Benjamin Millepied, over the holidays. The announcement was a total surprise to everyone since we were too busy being psychologically warped by her movie to even care about her personal life.

2. Elton John became a happy daddy. Sir Elton John and his partner David Furnish are now proud daddies to a little baby boy. He was born from a surrogate mother on Christmas Day, and his name is Zachary Jackson Levon Furnish-John. Whew, that’s a long name – but at least it’s normal-ish. This is a super cute Christmas story, so congrats guys!

3. Reese Witherspoon is also engaged. To continue with this string of new engagements are Reese Witherspoon and Jim Toth, who recently confirmed that they’re getting married. I can’t help but be jealous of Reese’s romantic life, which includes Ryan Phillippe and Jake Gyllenhaal, but I don’t know about this guy… I mean, I guess he’s kind of hot. Either way, congratulations are in order.

4. 84-year-old Hugh Hefner gets engaged… to a 24-year-old. To which I can only say… ewwww. Hugh Hefner proposed to his girlfriend, Playboy Playmate Crystal Harris, over the holidays. Hugh tweeted the news, saying, “A truly memorable Christmas Eve.” Yeah I would say so. I vommed all over my grandmother when this news forced me to picture Hugh naked.

5. Kelly Osbourne went a little bit crazy. Back to the insane celeb stories we’re a little more used to. Kelly’s boyfriend Luke Worrall, who she’s been dating for the last two years, has apparently been cheating on her – something Kelly unfortunately found out about over the holidays. Aw, sucks girl. But Kelly obviously isn’t about to let him get away with it without trying to embarrass him a little – which is exactly why she let the world know how much of a dirtbag he is through Twitter. She tweeted, “All he did was use me. All girls, beware of @Luke_worral he is a using c*nt! He used me for my money a free ride.” Everyone’s talking about how insane Kelly is but, hey, can you really blame her?

NYE Spent At Home Watching The Ball Drop

1. Amber Portwood goes to jail. I know that as a gossip blogger, I’m supposed to care about these things… but I can honestly say that I really don’t care at all about MTV’s Teen Mom OR Amber Portwood. Unfortunately, I still have to read about her. And after all of the physical and emotional abuse she laid on her baby-daddy, she definitely deserves to go to jail – and definitely does NOT deserve to see her baby girl any more.

2. Rihanna and her BF Matt Kemp supposedly split. I guess love didn’t come to everyone during the holidays – Rihanna and her cute boyfriend Matt Kemp have allegedly broken up. According to Us Weekly, neither one of them are really that upset about the split. I really wonder who she’s gonna be with next…

3. Someone named Ke$ha the worst dressed of 2010. Okay, so this isn’t really news, but I just really wanted to add it because I completely agree with it. Ke$ha’s outfits are just not okay. Ever. And I know she’s trying to be as edgy and out-there as Lady Gaga and Nicki Minaj, but she’s just not. Celeb stylist Phillip Bloch tells her to call him, because “what you’re doing is just not working!” HA.

4. I know you didn’t think it could be possible, but even more celebs announced their engagement. Lily Allen and her boyfriend are going to get married, which is cute news…and then LeAnn Rimes and Eddie Cibriani also announced they’re getting married, which is just not as cute. And I say that because we all know that LeAnn totally stole Eddie right under his wife’s nose.

5. Someone wants to make a movie out of Lindsay Lohan’s life. I don’t know, this could be good, or it could be epically bad. You would think that Lindsay would be thrilled by any kind of publicity at this point, but no. Her and Dina are furious. Anyway, one screenwriter wants to take on the task of making a Lindsay Lohan biopic – and I have to say, I’d definitely buy tickets.

WTF Friday: The Internet Explained (By Morons)
WTF Friday: The Internet Explained (By Morons)
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