In the last year, it seems as though being single has been my specialty. While flings and hookups have come and gone (pun intended) and dates have left me with some less than desirable memories, my current single status has remained loyally by my side. I’ve learned a lot in the past year and I’ve discovered that single girls around the world are all in the same fabulous pair of shoes.
So if you’re sick of sitting at a table for one, eating a meal portioned for two, I cordially invite you to join The Single Girl Society, where being single is more than status, it’s a lifestyle. Of course, with everything in life, the single girl lifestyle comes with rules and I’ve picked up quite a few along the way. So kick back, grab a drink and let the lessons I’ve learned serve as your very own roadmap to transitioning to and enduring the single life.
So it’s the New Year and you’ve been up in the gym workin’ off the pounds you gained this break, doing your best to make your 2011 resolutions actually pan out this year. Well here’s one to consider implementing into your dating regimen to really shake up your single life.
Lesson 6: Take a chance on someone you don’t think is your “type.”
Every girl is guilty of settling into a type of guy. Whether it’s the frat-tastic guy in the pink polo or the brooding tortured artist, we all pine for certain types of guys. And have you ever noticed it’s those “types” that keep leaving you with mascara tears and Mint Milano overdoses?
2011 is the year to rid yourself of your “type.” So what if you’re into Southern gentlemen and the guy asking you out doesn’t drive a pickup truck? So what if the guy in front of you doesn’t go to a country club to appease to your yuppie taste? And so what if your date doesn’t play guitar?
Just because you’re branching out doesn’t mean you have to abandon your “type” all together. Just think of it as broadening your horizons.
If you were to compare dating to college, your major would represent your “type” whereas your electives would represent the types of guys you dated that are nothing like the type of guy you usually go for. Make the most of those electives; you’re not doing your single life any favors by rejecting guys simply because they don’t look exactly like your last boyfriend.
Dating the same type of guy over and over again makes you lazy. You begin to see all of your dates as some stereotypical shell of everything you usually go for, which isn’t fair to your date and it isn’t fair to yourself. Just because you’ve only ever dated frat guys doesn’t mean every frat guy you date is going to be the same and if you settle into a pattern, you’re not allowing those guys to stand out from the others you’ve dated.
So while you think you’re doing yourself a favor by sticking to one type, you’re actually dooming your date from the start by assuming they possess the qualities that you’ve given your “type” in true stereotype fashion.
On the other hand, dating guys you wouldn’t normally go for keeps you on your toes. Your habitual assumptions about the guys you date become obsolete. You truly have to learn who the guy is. In dating a different “type” you’ll discover his favorite movies, whereas before it’s safe to say you could’ve guessed them correctly (Old School or Top Gun). You’ll learn his style (not every guy rocks a Brooks Brothers dress shirt on the daily). And in getting to know the little things about your guy, you’ll also learn the big things along the way, like how he deals with conflict or if he’s been heartbroken in the past or how big a role his family plays in his life.
So take the dates you normally would’ve laughed off with your girlfriends. Ask out the guys you normally think would be looking at a girl that dresses nothing like you. Go ahead, fall for someone who doesn’t fit into your five-year plan. You could do more than surprise yourself – you could fall in love.
What are the first 5 rules of the Single Girl Society? Find out right here.