Dear Celebs: It's Called a Joke!

Does this look like a mean man? No!

Dear Stars and Starlets of Hollywood,
I understand that many of you are feeling a little hurt from Ricky Gervais’ monologue. And I have three little words for your GET OVER IT!
(Take a deep breath now before you read the rest. Good? Good.)
It’s a joke.  The whole world loves to see comedians (such as Rickey Gervais or Kathy Griffin) poke fun at other celebrities. It’s like seeing the popular girls in school get taken down, but better because it’s on national television….and you have to keep smiling.
The audience (the people spending their money watching your movies) loves it; why else would celebrity gossip magazines be flying off the shelf every week? Oh and Ms. Jolie – how many movies have you had succeed at the box office? Who are you practically married to again? Oh right, Brad Pitt.  I think you can handle a little joke about The Tourist. I’d let anyone make fun of me so long as I could come home to those arms of steel.

And another thing, aren’t you constantly told to have a thick skin to be in the acting world? Well where is it?! I mean you all must get rejected countless times at auditions — shouldn’t you be able to handle a little joke every now and then?
Not to mention most of the people who made it to the Gervais’ cut-you-down-because-it’s-funny list were all celebs that have been in the news recently. He wasn’t talking about some big hush hush secrets; he was merely commenting on what we all already knew…and joked about. I mean, Charlie Sheen hasn’t exactly been subtle about his recent adventures. The funny man just made it well…funnier.
And while we’re on this “get over yourself” subject, let’s keep it going. After all, it wasn’t just the Golden Globes that has been getting all your Hollywood panties in a bunch. I’ve seen how you all react to the clips from SNL or when you’re featured on a talk show. Robert Pattinson, I see that killer look in your eyes when you’re poked fun at for playing something that sparkles. Well people, live with your decisions. Because unlike the rest of us, you chose a career that happens to be in the public eye. And you get rewarded pretty handsomely for it.
Speaking of SNL, Mrs. Tom Cruise, I get that you are rather sensitive, but boycotting the Oscars because you’re mad at Anne Hathaway? Please. I understand that your career hasn’t really taken off like you hoped since you got married to Tommy and you haven’t had the luxury of mocking others on SNL, but it happens. You weren’t the first person to be satirized and you won’t be the last. So get off your high horse and learn how to laugh. Making a fuss just makes you look like a prude who can’t take a joke and if we’ve learned anything from The Situation, it’s that no one likes a prude.
To the rest of you lot, maybe you need to watch some funny clips from YouTube or something and relearn how to take a joke. Just because you make millions from movies does not exclude you from being made fun of, so come on down from the pedestal you all have placed yourself on and crack a smile. Yes, Nicole Kidman, it might mess with your daily Botox injections but it’s totally worth it.
Courtney (aka Tay Swift’s BFF)

P.S. I do understand that your personal life is unfortunately in the public eye, and I am sorry. I can’t imagine how annoying that must be. But still…you signed up for this ish so deal with it.

Surviving Senior Year: Preparing for the End
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