Friday Faves: 5 Things Your Dude Secretly Loves

A lot of times, the fighting and rivalry between sexes causes a behavior called ‘reduction,’ where each sex reduces the other one to a short list of (of I don’t know, lets say 13 or 14) traits, to belittle others and to make themselves feel like the true social scientist they know they are. But, all fun aside, we know that regardless of genitalia, people are actually quite complex. That’s really our evolutionary flaw. We develop consciousness to avoid needing night-vision eyes or long ass necks and accidentally give ourselves all these hangups and fears.
So, with that complexity in mind, let’s take a look at 5 thing’s your boyfriend loves that he might be to afraid to admit to.
5 ) Legos. Alright, not sure why ANYONE would be afraid to admit to loving these, but I see a lack of Legos in college dorm rooms and honestly I don’t know why. Legos are fun sober and SUPER fun when drunk. Maybe guys aren’t afraid to admit that they ‘did love these, when I was a kid,’ but can’t come to grips with the fact that they still think about going back and really finishing that Star Destroyer replica, now that they’ve got the money to buy the right color blocks. Buy your boyfriend Legos for his next birthday, and watch his face light up.
4 ) Unicorns. For some reason these magical, fair and royal creatures of ancient myth have garnered a feminine association in modern day. Which is total bullshit, FYI, since Unicorns are awesome and guys shouldn’t feel ashamed that they love them and wish they could ride them sometimes, or maybe just watch two unicorns eat grass and gently nuzzle each other. Pop ‘The Last Unicorn’ into your DVD player and see what happens. Prediction: 5 minutes of ‘come on let’s watch something else’ and then 1 hour and 45 minutes of wide-eyed enrapture.
3 ) Pro Wrestling. Now let’s move to the other side. Everyone knows guys have trouble admitting that they love stuff that might be perceived as ‘female’ but what about stuff thats inherently ‘male,’ or in this case ‘stupid.’ We love pro-wrestling, we can’t help it. The disdain that we try to muster for it comes not from being ‘too sophisticated’ but rather from having our tiny 9-year-old hearts shattered when we learned that Wrestling is fake and that Hulkamania, in fact, won’t run wild all over the bully at school.
Doubt me? Wiki it and do some research. Ask your boyfriend a question about wrestling characters in the last 2 years, something contemporary. Prepare for an intricate explanation of the storyline. (Additionally I’d like to point out that women get to watch soap operas and call it ‘kitschy fun’ but if men watch wrestling, which is just a man-soap-opera, we are cromagnums.)
2 ) Other dude’s beards. If you’ve ever had a conversation with your boyfriend about how good another guy looks, chances are he either says ‘I don’t look at dudes’ or changed the words ‘Brad Pitt is handsome’ to ‘Ya he’s pretty jacked, good tris and lats.’ The truth is we don’t really admire things like dimples and cheekbones in other men, but we do admire other men’s beards.
Whether we have beards of our own and see some type of knightly brotherhood in another beard wearer, or simply wish we could grow a beard, save losing our girlfriend or our job, beards are something we look at constantly. Occasionally while whispering under our breath ‘yeah, that’s…that’s really nice…really full…I wonder if he conditions?
1 ) Bravo Programming. For a channel thats supposed to be for ‘alternative lifestyles’ they sure have a lot of MILF based programming. MILFS in OC, MILFS in NY. We came for the hot older ladies (and hot lesbians on Work Out) but stayed for the sensitive story lines on Top Chef and Project Runway.
[This story was originally posted by CollegeCandy’s original guy. Want mas? Don’t worry, there are plenty more faves where this came from.]

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