In the last year, it seems as though being single has been my specialty. While flings and hookups have come and gone (pun intended) and dates have left me with some less than desirable memories, my current single status has remained loyally by my side. I’ve learned a lot in the past year and I’ve discovered that single girls around the world are all in the same fabulous pair of shoes.
So if you’re sick of sitting at a table for one, eating a meal portioned for two, I cordially invite you to join The Single Girl Society, where being single is more than status, it’s a lifestyle. Of course, with everything in life, the single girl lifestyle comes with rules and I’ve picked up quite a few along the way. So kick back, grab a drink and let the lessons I’ve learned serve as your very own roadmap to transitioning to and enduring the single life.
So you’re in the middle of a particularly “blah” dinner date and your date launches into (yet another) story about quail season and you’re about to give up all hope and consider joining a convent just so you’ll never have to put yourself through this kind of cruel and unusual punishment ever again.
Look, I know where you’re coming from. You start to drink heavily standing by the reasoning that if your date refuses to have a personality, you’ll just have to let the liquor create one for him. You keep glancing at your cell wondering why your best friend has yet to call with your routine emergency date rescue call. We’ve all been there. It’s those nights that being single gets such a bad rep.
So why is that after such awful dates we still waver when considering a follow-up date?
Lesson 8: Trust your instincts.
I know it seems like it should go without saying, but sometimes as singles we get pushed into giving people another chance when we know good and well, our minds have been made up before we even go on the next date.
Give yourself some credit and trust the little voice in your head that says you should bail or turn your back on a potential suitor.
So when you’re telling your girlfriends that you’re definitely not planning on seeing the business major you went on a date (if you could call rolling your eyes while he tells yet another story about his family’s ranch a date) with, don’t let them convince you into changing your mind just because “he’s stupid gorgeous and comes from Old Southern money.”
You’re single, not cursed! Don’t feel obligated to constantly dole out chances for guys you’ve already tried your hand with and don’t let anyone discredit you and cajole you into dating someone who rubbed off on you the wrong way. There’s a difference between taking a chance on someone who isn’t your type and continuing to date a guy you know isn’t right for you just because there are no other prospects on the horizon and you just so happen to need a date for your sorority’s semi-formal.
You’re not doing yourself or your date any favors by continuing to see him even though some part of you already decided there’s something to hold you back from him.
More importantly, don’t waste your time dramatically going back and forth, wondering if you should go out with a guy again when you blatantly spent more time tearing him to pieces to your friends than complimenting him. Trust yourself if your instincts tell you not to date a guy and don’t let your friends convince you of something other than what you know – like that hunting stories and a Brooks Brothers-clad business major just aren’t your thing.
[Do you agree? Disagree? Sound off, singles!]
Get the first 7 rules of the Single Girl Society right here.