Like most of my friends, I went on birth control my freshman year of college. But unlike most of my friends, I didn’t go on it because I was having sex (if you know what I looked like freshman year you’ll understand why that was a long way off), but because it seemed like the thing to do. And because I heard it would make my period more pleasant. And my boobs bigger.
It did all those things, but it also gave my terrible migraine headaches every time placebo pills came around. Finally, after two years of headaches and 5 pill changes, I gave up and quit the pill.
To me, it wasn’t a big deal. Condoms weren’t the most convenient thing (and were a bit of a ‘moment killer’), but they were a lot more convenient than debilitating headaches that had me lying in complete darkness with an ice pack on my head for 5 hours. I mean, what’s the point of birth control if you’re in too much pain to get it on?
And then I met my boyfriend.
And then 3 months later, when it was time to seal the deal, I casually mentioned that I wasn’t on the birth control pill.
The way he looked at me, you would have thought I told him I had a penis.
“You’re not on The Pill?” He looked heartbroken.
I explained to him my reasons, told him we’d just have to use condoms, and then tried to get the ball rolling (if you know what I’m saying). Only he didn’t have any condoms. Turns out, he was so used to girls just being on The Pill that he didn’t stock condoms in his bedside drawer. And that’s when I realized the great Birth Control Issue sweeping across college campuses.
The Pill has become so prevalent, so expected, so commonplace, that guys just expect girls to be on it. They take it for granted and act as if the rug has been pulled out from under them when they find out we’re not. Guys don’t understand what The Pill does to our hormones (like making me weep uncontrollably at Sandra Bullock movies to the point that the person behind me had to check in and make sure I was OK), our bodies (5 lb weight gain that just won’t go away? Awesome.), or our wallets (that sh*t isn’t cheap, you know). They just know that it means no babies (without them having to do anything), and take full advantage of the fact that so many girls decide to use it.
Do they offer to pay for it? Nope. In fact, many often grumble when we tell them that we’d like to also use condoms (double protection = no babies in the dorm room), complaining about the cost, not to mention the whole “but I can’t feel anything” excuse. It’s like, despite the fact that birth control is something both parties clearly benefit from, it’s the girl’s responsibility to make sure it happens. And on the one hand, that makes me angry; why the hell should I have to pay for it and remember to use it and put the damn thing on with my mouth so we don’t lose the moment?
But on the flip side, could I really trust a guy to stay on top of things? Negativo.
Still, is it that hard to have a condom on hand? Come on, boys. Work with me here!
Let’s see what our guy has to say. Check out his take on CoedMagazine.