Playboy Names Best Party Schools; I Scratch My Head

Frat boys rejoice, Playboy has just released its 2011 top picks for Best Party Schools in America (and Canada?)
Looking at the list, the West-Coast and Southern schools are owning everyone else in social activity, and this East-coast girl is more than disappointed. Out of ten schools, only Penn State is representing us in the league of beer-pong, keg stands and flip cup. Thank you, Happy Valley for showing up. Personally, for the school that invented State Patty’s Day, I think these kids deserve top billing, but there’s always next year.
Never to be forgotten, we have the lovely institution of Arizona State, which always makes the list thanks to their Sun Devils dedication. I think the fact that their beloved “Pitchfork” resembles “The Shocker” says all about how these kids get down. Whatever you’re into, right? Who cares if your diploma holds less value than a GED, when you’re surrounded by the best parties and a college bar town that cannot be rivaled in all of America?
But while many schools on this list make total sense (UC-Santa Barbara, obviously; being that close to the beach just isn’t fair. Anyone can make the list of best party school when you live Spring Break not one week a year, but every week, for four years!) I can’t help but wonder what the guys over at Playboy were thinking when they made their top picks. Really, how can Playboy truly judge a school’s party potential without personally taking body shots off the school President and drunk eating with some frat boys? (Sidenote: that would make a year of completely awesome hands-on research. Where can I sign up?)
I mean, how does the University of Western Ontario, which, newsflash, isn’t in America, beat out my state school? And what is it about Wisconsin that makes it more “party school” than any other state school in the country? Are they playing beer pong in Psych lecture? Ripping shots in review sessions? We party plenty hard at UMD, so I can’t imagine what these kids could be doing to get ahead in the rankings (without getting their stomachs pumped weekly).
And really, why is Playboy the party school expert, anyway? Shouldn’t they be ranking schools based on boob size and the number of potential bunnies? Or maybe they did….. That’s really the only reason I can imagine Maryland was left off the list. Again.
What do you think about Playboy’s rankings? And why does YOUR school deserve to be on the list?

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