Guns and Other Things That Should Not Be Allowed on College Campuses

I’m sure by now everyone has heard about the 7 states considering the legalization of guns on campus. With schools usually¬†being gun free zones this has caused some uproar among students and professors and just about anyone else with a pulse. Those in favor of legalizing firearms on campus say that allowing students and faculty to carry guns on campus will allow them to protect themselves if a shooter (who would now be totally free to tote a gun to school) comes into the building and opens fire.

Those opposed see the irony in the above situation.

The truth is, there are some things that just shouldn’t be allowed on campus. Like guns. And parents. And….

The crazy preacher: You know this guy, the one who stands in the middle of the path where thousands of students flock between breaks. The one who shouts how we are all damned, unless we go to his church? The one who tries to shove Jesus pamphlets into our hands as we evoid him and scurry by as quickly as possible. Honestly, I could do without being told I’m damned on a daily basis.

The professor who gets a little too close: I’ve only experienced this with male professors, but I’m sure there are female professors out there are well. This is the prof who, when asking a question, leans in a little too close for comfort, maybe takes a whiff of your hair. Who doesn’t quite focus on your eyes when you’re talking. Who encourages you to meet him for office hours….at the local bar….on a Saturday.

Mini-skirts and Uggs/shorts and Uggs: Maybe I missed some sort of fashion statement, but if it’s cold enough to warrant shearling boots, it’s too cold to show 99% of your leg and 1% of your lady bits. Can we get Joan Rivers up in here to start handing out fashion citations?

Textbooks heavier than a pound: In the age of Kindles and iPads and even laptops that weigh less than 3 pounds, there’s got to be a way for us to get our learn on without doing irreparable damage to our backs. I came here to get an education, not a hunchback.

Babies: Look, I applaud the many parents who decide to pursue their education to further their careers. Go you! But that doesn’t make it less weird to see babies running through the library, at the local pizza place during my pre-dinner snack time, or being pushed down the street in a stroller as I’m lugging home a 30-pack of Natty Light. Really, it’s just wrong.

Now it’s your turn. What are some things YOU want to see banned from campus?

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