Friends With Benefits: Is it Actually Possible?

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I feel like college women have been debating this issue forever. Is friends with benefits really possible? Can guys and girls remain friends when frisky foreplay and steamy make out sessions replace platonic homework parties and innocent lunch dates? The whole ordeal is snagging national attention thanks to the upcoming movie “Friends with Benefits” starring JT and Mila Kunis in theaters next month.

(Wait a second, have I seen this movie before? This issue is totally getting the Hollywood treatment, which proves it really does need to be addressed.)

After witnessing this phenomenon time and time again, and carefully considering the outlandish actions of girlfriends, sorry ladies, I have come to a conclusion. Can friends with benefits work in the real world? Absolutely Not.

Enter Melanie*

She and her “friend” Matt* had been doing the deed all fall semester. She refused to admit any real feelings. Instead Melanie claimed they were just close friends looking to add a little thrill to their otherwise boring lives. Sounds ok so far, right?

But the college world is filled with formals, crush parties and other functions; men are constantly picking up dates for one event after another.  When said “friend” didn’t invite Melanie to his formal, things started to get less sexy and a whole lot messier.

Our texting conversation went a little bit like this:

“OMG Matt is taking that skanky freshman to formal. Wtf?!!”

“Aw, that sucks. I know you really wanted to go with him.”

“Ew no of course I didn’t. But her?! He can do so much better. She’s like, not even pretty”

“I mean, of course she is. Maybe he likes her.”

“Geez. You just don’t even understand. NM.”

I don’t understand… that you’re madly in love with him? That you’re unbelievably jealous? That what started as raunchy sex in public places has now shifted into cute PDA? No, I actually have a handle on all of that. And the terrible thing is, we’ve all seen this time and time again.

In my three years of college (trigger senior year freak-out) I have never once heard of friends with benefits going smoothly. Someone gets jealous and drama results. Or someone gets bored and friendships get destroyed over less than stellar orgasms. Which, by the way, is something I think we should all strive to avoid.

And it works both ways too. None of this “friends with benefits can’t work because girls are too emotional and men are too physical” B.S. Spare me. As soon as snuggling becomes a part of the routine both sexes are equally prepped for an emotional roller coaster that just can’t end well.

So please, just date already, or move on. There are plenty of strictly “benefit” people around campus, so you should leave your friends out of your love life.

COLLEGECANDY Writer
COLLEGECANDY Writer
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