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This Blog Will Change Your Life: Week 3

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[There comes a time in every girl’s life, (usually after a third or fourth martini), when she realizes “Damn, I need to do something… travel to Europe, take up Chinese, get married…someeeething! I need to change my life.” Finding myself in one such rut and without the cash-flow for a capricious jet-set to France, I decided to live by the book, take the plunge, and tackle the Benrik challenge. If you have never heard of Benrik’s This Book Will Change Your Life, crawl out from under the rock you have been living under, wipe the tired crust from your eyes, and listen up.]

Week 3- Task 1

Day 37 – Eat and Run

Let me preface this one by saying, I am a good person.  I swerve to avoid hitting animals. I give a few dollars to the homeless whenever I can. I even send over a bunch of toys for underprivileged children at Christmas! I am a good person, and even though the waitress I ran out on may say otherwise, I stand behind that statement. Now before you all judge me, let me say that I didn’t do this at a five star gourmet restaurant.  It was “Half-Off Night” at the local dive bar and my bill was only $2.00.  I found out later that my friend actually ended up paying for my drink and I paid him back the following day. So please, don’t fret. No waitresses were harmed in the completion of this task.

Week 3- Task 2

Day 310- Leave Flowers at an Old, Unattended Grave

The gentleman that received my flowers was named Cornelius Loveland. Seriously, I couldn’t make up a name like that if I tried.  Cornelius had died in 1826, which made his grave barely legible.  It did say, however, that the deceased was “A Good Friend.” After putting the flowers on this man’s grave, I noticed another interesting fact.  He was sharing his gravestone with a man named Frank E. I don’t know if this means that in addition to possessing the same stone, they also occupied the same grave, but I wasn’t going to stick around to find out. I had never seen anything like that before, but after leaving I was even more sure that Cornelius Loveland was probably a damn good friend.

Week 3- Task 3 

Day 82- Sit in the Lotus Position for 30 Minutes 

Ow.

Week 3- Task 4

Day 50- Get People to Notice You

I am not going to lie to you and tell you that I don’t like attention.  So when I came across this challenge, I was like “No problem. Bring it on!” Of course it is important to distinguish between “good attention” and “bad attention.” For example, owning the room in a brand new sequined mini is “good attention.” Being that girl on top of the pool table singing Free Bird, well that’s we call “bad attention.” Being no stranger to “good attention” I decided to challenge myself and seek out some “bad attention.” To do this, I went to Caribou this morning and read the newspaper… only thing is I read it upside-down. Helloooo Attention! It didn’t take long for people to notice that I was completely insane. First came the odd glances, then the snickers. I even got a full out laugh and a point. After the experiment was over I went up to one of the observers and asked them what they were thinking. He replied the following: “You looked intelligent, sitting here drinking coffee and reading the newspaper. At first I thought the newspaper had printed it wrong. But page after page and I was like, well I don’t know…” So did I get attention? Oh hell yes. “Good Attention?” Hahaha, No.

Week 3- Task 5

Day 79- Become An Expert on the Day

Today will go down in history as June 23, 2011 and in case you missed it, let me inform you on some of the major highlights of the day. Today, there are roughly 6, 926, 683, 328 people on earth. It is 82 degrees and partly sunny in Sinapore, 77 degrees and sunny in Brasília, and 52 degrees with a chance of rain in Juneaeu. The Uva Unicorns played against the Basnahira Bears in cricket and the NBA draft continues with ongoing negotiations. Lindsay Lohan arrived to court early after failing a recent alcohol test. George Clooney is single. The world’s first dog was fitted with four prosthetic paws and is doing fine. Green Lantern is at the top of the box office hits at $53.1M and Maroon 5’s “Moves Likes Jagger” is number one on iTunes. The Boston mob boss, known as Whitey, was lured out of hiding in California. A storm damages the Kentucky Derby track, two planes nearly crash at JFK and Gaga has helped tourism rates go up in Tokyo.

That’s today. Any questions?

COLLEGECANDY Writer
"I make mistakes. It's what I do. I speak without thinking. I act without knowing. I drink so much I can barely walk...But I'm a fantastic lover, an amazing friend, and God knows I mean well." -SJP