Glamour Says The Darndest Things: August Edition

When I first laid eyes on this month’s issue of Glamour, my attention immediately went to the “THE JEANS THAT MAKE YOU INSTANTLY LOOK SLIMMER” headline. Offensive, to say the least. Because you know, as women, we can’t just be content and proud of our bodies as-is. We have to constantly seek ways to look skinnier and hide our (completely socially-defined) flaws. Way to be empowering and encouraging, Glamour!
The other most offensive part of this cover is the fact that somehow, Heidi Klum, a professional supermodel, looks ridiculously plastic on the cover. Like, really, Heidi Klum has to be airbrushed to almost unrecognizability for the cover? I don’t think so. (Naturally, every inside photos looks phenomenal.) Already so much poor judgment and I’m not even 10 pages into the magazine yet. As I flip through, I’m bored by the mostly uninspired fashion advice – denim dresses are in no way sexy. Stop perpetrating lies. Eventually, I got to the column written by “Jake,” Glamour’s version of The Dude, and this month, he’s giving us insight to why guys have problems with commitment.
Glamour says: Need for newness.
Jasmine says: Or an immature perspective based on a childish need for your partner to be a distraction from your dull existence.
Glamour says: Fear of tears issues.
Jasmine says: I’m all about avoiding getting hurt/hurting others as much as possible. That said, actively blowing off someone you’ve been dating because you’re “scared of getting hurt” is cowardly. Incredibly disrespectful. Rude. Not to mention, hurtful to the person you’re dating.
Glamour says: Daddy issues.
Jasmine says: Obviously, our relationships with our parents play a huge role in shaping the kind of people we grow up to be as adults, and I’m sure that men who have extraordinarily wonderful or extraordinarily awful fathers are terrified of not living up to their father’s legacy, or following in their father’s neglectful footsteps. That said, we all have fears and baggage to overcome, and that is part of being a functional, fulfilled, happy adult who doesn’t cultivate a reputation for being terrible at relationships.
To see even more funny fun times from everyone’s favorite fashion/lifestyle magazine, click here!

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