Tuffy Luv Sez: Be Yourself!

Question?! Answer: Ask Tuffy Luv.
Dear Tuffy Luv,
Here’s what’s up. I need you to help me. I NEED you to tell me if I’m being crazy (probable) or right (….also probable *sad face*). So a mere 3 weeks ago, I decided to date one of my best friends. We’ve been close friends for 5 years, best friends for 2 of those years, and he’s liked me for 3. HOWEVER, we never dated because, despite caring about him more than anyone ever, I was never sexually attracted to him. But recently I said, “what the fudge?!” and agreed to date him, and on our first night out as bf/gf, I glanced over, we locked eyes, and WHAM. It hit me. I’ve been in love with this dude for 5 years. This was baaaaaad.
Fast-forward 3 weeks and here I am. Wondering if he likes me. I question every little thing he says, or should I say, DOESN’T say. We never talk anymore!! He always apologizes, saying he just doesn’t have anything interesting in his life (understandable. it’s the summer), but I’m afraid there’s something more going on. We sit there for five minutes without saying anything, and while it’s not awkward, it’s torture on my poor soul! He notices this and tries to make me feel better (he even wants us to do read together so we have something to talk about!), but then we’ll slip back into silence.
Not to say our whole relationship is silence. We’ll have little 20 minute spurts of relationship gold where we make jokes, laugh, delight in our amazing chemistry, we hold hands and he talks about how it’ll be when we’re married, but lo and behold: ANOTHER SILENCE AWAITS just around the river bend…….
So am I crazy or has he really lost hope in trying to date me? Is the fact that we’re still together proof that he still likes me? Is he just nervous/out of things to say? Or do I bore HIM?
Help please : (
Love,
Unluckily Lucky.
Dear Unluckily Lucky,
Girl, you have got to chill out.
I’ma take a leap here and say the weirdness you’re noting in him is actually a reaction to the weirdness you’re giving off.
I mean, you sound totally panicked. Like every time you’re with him, all you can think about is whether or not he loves you.
Girl, you have got to cut that shoop out.
You’re clearly making him uncomfortable, because you’re being weirdly overconcerned with how he sees you/your relationship/EVERYTHING. Then HE acts weird, because you’re acting weird, and then you get worried that he’s weird so you act even WEIRDER and suddenly it’s all silence.
So, okay. Here’s what you should remember.
He likes you for YOU. He’s been in love with you for 3 years as YOU, not as some hyper-worried Stepford Girlfriend who wants her man to be PLEASED WITH HER ALL THE TIME.
Take a deep breath, get your you back on, and go be yourself!!!
I promise if you can do that, your relationship will be the awesome thing it’s meant to be.
Maybe you just need to give yourself a little pep talk. Look yourself in the mirror every time you’re about to see him. Lock eyes with your reflection. And say the following five times, slowly, out loud: He likes me for me.
I swear this works. It’s called a mantra. That’s the power of the mind, kids.
So do the mantra, chill, and be yourself. And go have fun with your guy, for crap’s sake!!!
Tuffy Sez: You can do it. Rah and shoop.
Hearts & Skulls,
Tuffy Luv

Dude's List: 11 Lies Women Tell Men
Dude's List: 11 Lies Women Tell Men
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