In Defense of Sweatpants

[Last week one of our writers told you why she thought sweatpants should never be worn in public. A lot of you had some heated opinions, most of which disagreed and supported the argument for sweatpants — wearing them from your bed to class…and everywhere in between. Turns out a few of the CC writers agreed with you, so we invited one of our lovely ladies to state her case for the other sweatpants lovin’ side.]
Because our first go at deciphering the (ugly) language of sweatpants created such a stir, we’ve decided to give our readers what they want: a rebuttal argument in defense of our beloved, timeless sweatpants.
Clap your hands say yeah!
First, lets take a short stroll down memory lane. It is 8:54 on Monday morning in Burlington, VT and I have class at 9:10; the bus (UVM has five separate campuses all linked together by a bus system) comes at 9. Since I’m just rolling out of bed, I’m reaching for my sweatpants (if I’m changing pants at all).
Yup, that’s right, I’m grabbin’ my sweats. I’ll be the first to say it: I love ‘em!
So, for all of you that fled so quickly to the defense of my favorite sleepwear, lets dive right into the nitty gritty. Sweatpants, while they are definitely neither fashion forward nor even fashionable, are a definite YES for college girls. Here’s why:
1. Early Morning Classes
At some point in your college career you’re going to find yourself dealt the unfortunate hand of early morning classes. For some of us that might mean 8 or 9am and for our more grizzly bear-like friends, early morning classes might mean 10 or 11 (noon is pushing it, guys). Chances are after class you’re just going to roll right back into bed and take a killer nap. So why get dressed to just take it all back off again? Personally, I don’t like to actually get dressed until I’m showered and clean; there’s something about putting a pair of jeans on an unwashed and unloved body that just rubs me the wrong way. Sorry, but I’m not bending over backwards to put on a pair of jeans at 8am when the cutest boy in the room is still wearing his outfit from last night.  While the rest of the girls in the room might judge, be my guest. If you’re more interested in the condition of my clothing than of lecture going on up front, I think we know who’s going to walk away with a higher GPA.
2. Late Night Drunk Bites
The first thing that goes through my mind when they announce last call is snacks. Drunk eating is seriously important to me. Laugh all you want, but I’m sure it’s something you feel strongly about when you’re wasted too. In my mind, the late night drunk bite is as important as the drinks themselves. So now that you all know how much I like to eat, you’ll understand how much I don’t want to put jeans on in the morning. It doesn’t matter if I had a grape or half of a deep dish pizza, when I wake up the morning after and I’m hung-over and miserable, I’m not trying to put on anything tight or form-fitting until at least after 2pm (unless my parents are in town because then I have to suck it up and in). So what if I gain a couple of college pounds? I’ll go to the gym a lot this week. Or maybe I won’t. Maybe I’ll just enjoy the fact that I’m 22 and in a few short years I’m going to spend the rest of my life wishing for my 22 year old metabolism. So ladies, scarf down your chicken-bacon-ranch slices with pride and be proud of your sweats!
3. Cozy, Comfy Reminders of Home
Someone mentioned in a comment that they loved their sweatpants because they reminded them of their high school sports teams and I couldn’t agree more. I played sports all throughout middle and high school and I love to throw on a pair of my faded, perfectly comfy lived-in sweats and lounge around. I’m sure a lot of you agree with this, too. Sometimes when you’re homesick or having a rough day, it only takes something small and simple to bring you closer to home: a smell, a show, a blanket, cookies or an article of clothing.
4. Up All Night Studying
Let me ask this first: who pulls an all-nighter in jeans and a blouse? Thought so. So now let me ask what you’re wearing if you’re not wearing jeans and a blouse? Right. Sweatpants. College is like a breeding ground for round the clock studying with big coffees in hand. Now, after you spend the entire night cramming for your linguistics exam what are you going to wear to take the exam? When you’re preoccupied with stuffing your brain full of phonological lingo, things like “showers” and “meals” become luxuries that you probably just don’t have time for. Chances are you’re going straight from your uncomfortable dorm room floor to your uncomfortable classroom seat, note-cards in hand, muttering to yourself. Who wants to be uncomfortable in their exam clothes? No thanks; I’d rather not tug at the back of my jeans all test long hoping my undies aren’t exposed to the nerd behind me. Instead, I’d rather being focusing on remembering where the hell that /g/ sound is formed in the mouth. And again, if you’re too busy studying the horrors of my sweatpants than answering question 63, guess who’s walkin’ away the sweatpants smarty-pants!?
While I’m sure there are tons and tons of other reasons we could think of that make sweatpants socially acceptable (like laundry day, last minute supermarket runs, cold weather) there are a few things left to discuss. Whoever said wearing anything “sweat” in public is just wrong, obviously never felt the warm, cozy, comfy bliss of a sweatshirt before.
Shout-out to all those sweatshirt virgins out there! Think hoodies are the fashion industry’s gift to (wo)mankind? Wait ‘til you wrap yourself around a pair of sweatpants. Talk about comfortable!
And as my final stand in defense of our comfy sweats, the iconic, ever-stylish Coco Chanel once said, “luxury must be comfortable, otherwise it is not luxury.”
So bring on the luxury and bring out the sweats!

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