Lesson #42- You are more than the guys you like. And think about. And obsess over.
College is a pretty consuming thing. Schoolwork including homework, group projects with people you wished you’d never met and studying for exams that promise to take up most of your time that week. Throw in a social scene — whether it’s your sorority’s slew of mixers and events or just hitting up the local bar scene for Thirsty Thursday with your best friends — and finding a balance becomes an art form. Oh, and don’t forget studying for exams that could determine the rest of your life like the LSAT or GRE, avoiding your mother’s incessant phone calls and the intensive yoga class that’s got you wondering if you’ll ever stop feeling sore.
So if a guy doesn’t take up the majority of your life, then why does he take up the majority of things running through your mind?
There are times when it only seems natural that thoughts of your man hijack your mind. I won’t lie, there have been days when I can’t seem to get a guy out of my head. Especially during those first sweet weeks of dating, when the air seems fresher, the squirrels on campus seem friendlier and the things that used to make you cringe now only slightly irritate you. Then again, there are days that aren’t so great, maybe the morning after a landmark fight, that you’ll make you wonder if anything else is even worth thinking about.
You can’t help the way you feel, but you can help the way you live your life. And if everything you think about brings you back to a guy, then maybe it’s time to switch up your routine.
Let’s face it, you’re single, so why spend so much time thinking about a boyfriend do you don’t even have? I hate to be harsh, but being single can be an amazing experience and it blows my mind when girls consider it something to be ashamed of, like a disease they need to cure immediately at the hands of every loser guy who walks in and out of their lives.
Don’t make men consume the majority of thoughts in your mind simply because the transition from being in a relationship to being single leaves you in a shock wave, or because you feel like you’ve been too single for too long.
There’s a difference between being boy crazy and being crazy over boys. I hate to sound like your mother but think of all the time you spend wondering if some guy you’re not even sure you like yet likes you back, and imagine what you could’ve done with all that time and energy. Pick up your passions or find new ones, and realize that you are more than the guy you like. Not every conversation with your girlfriends has to be about who their boyfriends want to hook you up with, and get drinks that don’t revolve around scoping out potential AmEx Black Card holders at the bar.
Got it? Feel empowered? Good. Now get the first 41 rules of the Single Girl Society