Seventeen Says The Darndest Things: December Edition

I always feel bad for Nikki Reed. I know she’s in the Twilight movies, but she definitely feels more like a third or fourth tier cast member. I feel like whenever anyone thinks “ladies of Twlight,” Kristen Stewart and Ashley Greene are the first to come to mind, and Nikki only gets recognition/interviews when Kristen and Ashley are otherwise preoccupied. Although at the end of the day, she’s getting far more bank than I ever will (and has way better hair than I do), so maybe I should save my pity for someone more deserving. But why does she look like a gun is being held to her head on the cover? She’s too pretty to look so deranged.
Luckily, the inside of the magazine is a lot more aesthetically pleasing. There’s an abundance of cute holiday fashion (at mostly reasonable prices). I also really appreciate that Seventeen did not promote dieting this issue. They supported eating your favorite treats, but emphasized the importance of moderation. I definitely prefer that message to deprivation, so brava Seventeen. Of course, no issue is complete without relationship advice. This month was definitely focused on “decoding” guys. Without further ado…
Seventeen says: When a guy puts his arm around you, he’s testing the waters.
Jasmine says: This may be legit at the beginning of a relationship, but also, the arm cuddle is definitely one of the most relaxed, publicly acceptable forms of affection, and if you’ve been dating for awhile, he just likes being affectionate with you.
Seventeen says: When a guy says “Gotta go” on IM, it’s not a snub. He’s just busy.
Jasmine says: I don’t think so. Normally a guy would say something like “I have to walk my dog” or “gotta finish this paper” or, you know, specific examples. “I got to go” sounds more like a shady avoidance measure.
Seventeen says: A guy who puts his feet on your lap is bored in your relationship.
Jasmine says: As part of a Mutual Foot Rest Society, all I can do is laugh at this. If anything, this means he’s very comfortable and feels close to you.
Seventeen says: When a guy says “I’m not sure where this is going” it’s not necessarily a breakup.
Jasmine says: …no way. If a guy doesn’t know where this is going, but he knows he likes you, he would never say this. That phrase is a definitely a passive aggressive breakup maneuver.
Seventeen says: “Sorry, I have to bail on you tonight” is not a blow-off.
Jasmine says: Yes, yes it is. Especially if it doesn’t include a rescheduling caveat. Oh, Seventeen, stop inspiring false hope. Yes, guys can be bad communicators, but they are also surprisingly adept at giving signs that They’re Just Not That Into You.

Candy Dish: Bye Bye Bye
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