After the post I did about how to successfully approach a man of interest, a few of you mentioned that your biggest concern was having nothing interesting to say. No one wants to walk up to a guy and be a bumbling idiot. It’s a fear that plagues everyone. And actually, it is in that fact that you can find comfort. 95 per cent of people out there are just as nervous to walk up to a stranger. The 3 per cent of the 5 remaining are only pretending to be as confident as they look, so that leaves a whopping 2 per cent of genuinely confident, cool and collected individuals. And those 2 per cent won’t judge you for being nervous (note: these stats are not scientifically based, but I’m fairly certain they’re accurate based on personal experience). So before you freak yourself out thinking you are about to walk up to a completely confident, self assured, perfect individual–don’t. More than likely they feel just as weird as you and will be thankful you were brave enough to break the ice.
When talking to the 15 able gentlemen for my last post, I came to the consensus that it really isn’t about what you say, but how you say it. No matter what, do not be fake or attempt to be the authority on something you aren’t. Boys will sense the bullshit. And you don’t need to laugh at everything they say for the sake of stroking their ego. They will see through that, too. Ryan commented, “Girls shouldn’t try too hard. It will become an exasperating arms race of bad jokes and lame references. That’s when I lose interest.” It’s all about playing to your particular strengths and not being ashamed to admit you don’t religiously follow hockey (unless you do!).
Also, never underestimate the power of simplicity. The easiest introduction is, “Hey, I’m Jenny. How is your night going? You here with friends?” It doesn’t have to be clever. “Do you live around here? What do you do?” All easy topics to discuss. Build off that and find some common ground. Keep up with current events and be able to comment on what’s going on in the world. Also, if you go into the conversation thinking, “I wonder if I’m going to like him,” instead of, “I really hope he likes me,” you’ll be much more at ease and feel less pressure. Remember, he needs to win you over, too!
Still feel the need for more? See below, but know that these ideas are not for everyone! I’ve laid out some good conversation starters based on different personality characteristics. You may be a combination of a few of these, so mix and match until you find something you are comfortable with. At the end of the day, if you aren’t comfortable, it’s going to make him really uncomfortable!