Tuffy Luv Sez: Good Girl

Question?! Answer: Ask Tuffy Luv. Or whatever.
Dear Tuffy Luv,
My mother is having a serious anxiety problem. I left for college in September and she’s still not over it. She calls me every single day and wants to talk about every single thing. I can’t take it. This is why I went away to school, so she couldn’t bother me all the time. I love her and we get along but I think it’s because she’s really lonely. She lives with my stepfather but they’ve been having some trouble lately and he’s sleeping on the couch. Anyway I want to be there for her but she’s really driving me crazy. Help, Tuffy!
Momma’s Girl
Dear Momma’s Girl,
This is quite the predicament! On the one hand, you don’t want to hurt your mom’s feelings. On the other hand you don’t want to go rark staving insane!!! By the by, I totally applaud you for being cool to your mom. Let’s get that out there. Applause, yes?! So, okay. Your question.
What if you set up phone dates with your mom? Like, specially designated times where you’re totally available to her. Explain that you have a lot on your plate at school, but you definitely don’t want to sacrifice your quality time with her. Set a schedule. Maybe start with three days a week. Block out 45-minute periods for her and let her know that you’re doing it because you want to give her your full attention.
I’m sure she’ll appreciate the effort, and, as long as you explain it lovingly (as above, man!), I’m sure she’ll be totally okay with it.
If she does balk, stay firm. Tell her you love her but that college is demanding and you just want to do the best you can both for yourself and for her to be proud of you.
And, as it sounds like you’re doing, be there for her. Ask her how she’s doing. Be supportive in her decisions about your stepfather.
Good girl, man. You are tops.
Hearts & Skulls,
Tuffy Luv
[Lead image via Supri Suharjoto/Shutterstock]

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