Things You Should NEVER Send Via Text

It would seem that the era of the ‘phone call’ is quickly diminishing, and more and more singles now turn to texting, gchat, email, facebook, twitter, [insert other social media outlet here] in order to communicate with romantic prospects. The lack of audio and visual cues in a conversation can make for some awkward, misinterpreted and downright uncomfortable moments between two people. Was that a joke? Was she being sarcastic? What did that period mean? Did he mean to send that or was it just a weird auto-correct? Why does she use so many emoticons?Ā  So much potential for misconstrued or completely ambiguous messages! While we do not yet have a complete guide for ‘texting etiquette,’ we do have a short list of things that you should NOT text someone. If you find yourself on the sending or receiving end of some derivative of any of the following messages…put your phone down STAT!
Some of these I have personally received…others come from friends and the CollegeCandy staff!
The Creepy
“Remember you said no creepy texts? I was looking for a picture that was the opposite of creepy to be humorous…I couldn’t find a good one.”
(This text came from a man who took the gal’s business card that had her cell phone listed. Not okay!)
The Clingy
“I know we just met, but I really, really like you. I fall really hard for people, and I can definitely tell I have fallen for you. I feel like I can be around you all the time. I want to be around you all the time. I should also tell you that I have separation anxiety.”
(If you just met, keep the crazy at bay, please!)
The ‘is this a joke?” It’s So Inappropriate
“I want to eat a burrito and dump it on your chest.”
The Change Your Life News
“I might be pregnant.”
(come on, at least call)
“So I got my tests results back…we need to talk”
(if this is STD news, you best meet him or her in person!)
The Completely Melodramatic
“You’re not even a real artist. You’re just a stupid writer with a clown’s tongue. You’re a f*ucking joke.”
“Let me in your damn apartment!”
“Wake up and answer me, damnit!”
“I’m done with you!”
(she’s definitely not responding or coming to the door, bro!)
The Unsexy Sexting
“I want to stick my face in your vagina.”
(maybe try something a bit more eloquent)
“I love the smell of your p*ssy”
(you creep me out!)
“Come suck daddy’s cock”
(no chance in hell)
The Baby Talk Too Soon

“Hey muffin head! What are you doing tonight? I wanna play with your wittle winky”
(ever seen ‘How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days?’) (this also fits into the unsexy sexting category)
“Hey baby-cakes I missy wissy you!”
The Are You An Ass or Just Stupid?
“Hey, great meeting you last night. We should definitely do it again sometime soon… by the way, what’s your friend’s number?”
“So does your mom go for younger guys?”
(she’s still married to my dad, thanks)
The Break Up Text
“I think we should start seeing other people”
(say it to my face, b*tch)
The Emoticons and Abbrev’sĀ 

“I luv u so much šŸ™‚ šŸ™‚ U R the gr8est! šŸ˜‰ @–>-“
(how about some hooked on phonics…and is that a rose?)

I Like Sex. Does That Make Me a Slut? [Friday Faves]
I Like Sex. Does That Make Me a Slut? [Friday Faves]
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