Tuffy Luv Sez: Blue Balls Are Real?!


Dear Tuffy Luv,
Sometimes when I don’t want to have sex my boyfriend says we have to because he gets blue balls. I always go along with it but what is it exactly and how can I keep him from getting it in the first place?
Blue Girl
Dear Blue Girl,
Well, today, Aunt Tuffy learned something new!
I was about to be all, BLUE BALLS IS A MYTH AND HE CAN GO FLOOP HIMSELF IN THE EAR, but then I looked it up, and, what do you know, blue balls is real. Okay, but, like, not the way guys generally present it. Apparently, men can get that uncomfortable sensation they’re claiming to get if they get too aroused and don’t get to release.
HOWEVER. First of all, not all that many men experience it, and so it’s awfully convenient that every man ever claims to get it when he just so happens to want to get in your pants.
If you don’t want to have sex, DO NOT HAVE IT. Period. Apparently, yes, he might feel pain (MIGHT. Big emphasis on MIGHT), but all he has to do is (1) take a cold shower, (2) wait it out (apparently it’s gone in an hour or two pretty much in all cases), or (3) do it his own damn self. I mean, honestly — he DOES know how to get himself off. FOR REALZ.
So next time he tries to force–er, excuse me, next time he gently suggests you must have sex with him when you don’t want to just because he has blue balls, please suggest to him one or all of those three options.
Or dump him for being a giant douchebag who tricks his girlfriend into having sex when she doesn’t want to. But maybe that’s just me.
Hearts & Skulls,
Tuffy Luv
Question?! Ask Tuffy Luv at tuffyluvcc [at] gmail [dot] com
[Lead image via lsantilli/Shutterstock]

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