Introducing Le Parcel, Because We Don’t Have The Balls To Buy Tampons

Y’all are familiar with Birchbox, Glossybox, Luvmybox, all the boxes that send you shit every month. These things are great, and you’re basically sending a present to yourself. That you paid for. But whatever. It’s nice to get stuff in the mail! Packages are fun, especially when filled with things you don’t really need.

But I’ve stumbled upon something that made me want to play leapfrog with a unicorn: Le Parcel. Le Parcel is a monthly service that mails you tampons and pads. Oh and chocolate and a gift like a cosmetic item or a watch as they show in their video. You select the brand you like, the amount of products you want, and the date you need your package to arrive. It then shows up in a cute little box ready for your menstruating self to use.

I’m sorry, but isn’t this a bit ridiculous? Women are already embarrassed enough to pick up tampons and pads at the drugstore or grocery store. And forget about asking a man to add those items to a grocery list. We can’t even talk about our periods. I left work once to go to a lady doctor, and my guy boss’s reaction to that was “I’VE HEARD ENOUGH JUST LEAVE!” So now we have a service to perpetuate this fear of periods because heaven forbid you go to the drugstore to buy tampons and salt and vinegar chips and a pack of Oreos. Now you don’t have to let the store clerk that you’re not ever going to see or the people that are browsing the aisles with you know that you’re about to bleed for six days and you might be cranky about it.

You know what? Bite me. When I first heard about this service, I was like “Oh that’s kind of cute.” BUT IT ISN’T. It’s ridiculous. There are also some issues with it. Like what if your period starts before your box is supposed to arrive. Then you’re going to have to go buy some tampons, which totally defeats the purpose. What if you don’t like the chocolate they send you and you don’t have any left in your PMS stash because obvi that’s all we eat when we’re on our periods? I also have a weird feeling about getting tampons that aren’t in a new box that I purchased and opened myself. Like we don’t know what’s happening in Le Factory for Le Parcel.

How about we just stop with this nonsense? Grow some lady balls and go buy yourself some damn tampons. Better yet, buy a big ole box so you have them. Heck, buy a few so you don’t have to go to the store for a while. Put some in your purse, in your desk at work, in your car. Be prepared maybe? You probably have more condoms lying around then you do tampons. You have no problem buying condoms so why are you so afraid of tampons? Would you rather be buying diapers? I think not. So lady-up and get some Tampax. Or if you’re that scared, order them in bulk off Amazon.

Caitlin is a graduate of the University of Alabama who has an obsession with cupcakes, coffee, and Harry Potter. She always has random fun facts and is now living and adventuring in New York City. Follow her fabulous life @caitlincorsetti. You’re welcome!

[Lead image via Le Parcel]

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