Stuck in a Dating Desert [Diary of the Undateable]

Remember last year’s hood ratchet anthem from my personal favorite hood ratchet rapper, Future? “Turn on the Lights” is the Dirty South equivalent of “Single Ladies”…an anthem for a guy that seeks the woman of his dreams. She’s a “good” girl who doesn’t cheat, keeps her promises and happens to have a pretty face, a big ‘ol booty and a closet full of Vuitton and Yves Saint Laurent. And here’s the kicker – Future looks for this dream girl in the VIP line of a club.

I, like Future, am always on the scope for a few good men. Not saying he has to be a rapper or reformed d-boy. Just a nice, normal young man to talk to and kick it with. But the thing is…I don’t know where to look.

Where do I find a man? No seriously, where? Some say it’s as simple as stepping outside. My favorite mags and blogs always say that eligible bachelors are everywhere – class, campus, coffeehouses, clubs, church, the mall, the library…you name it. And I don’t know. Maybe I’m blind, but I just haven’t seen that many where I am. D.C. is a small place…68.3 miles, 4 quadrants, same faces. Whenever I’m at those places I listed, I see guys who are already with girls. Or guys hanging out with other guys. Or creepos who are just way too aggressive for me. Not the cute, well-dressed, well-educated and well-read tall twenty-somethings that I’ve been dreaming up. I’ve done the typical bar stakeouts – sitting pretty, watching and waiting ‘til something or someone interesting happens. I’ve been to campus programs with cute class presidents. My friends and I have even positioned ourselves on park benches in areas where the young, suited and booted political interns roam during lunch break. And still, nothing.

It’s a conversation (and complaint?) that’s had by girls all around the world. Literally. When I was in Germany last September, one of my program’s tour guides echoed the same sentiments that have been plaguing my stateside friends and me.

“Whenever I go out, I notice that there are more attractive girls than more attractive guys,” she admitted. “And it’s not like a sexuality thing. I’m straight. But it’s just so hard to find guys that I’m actually interested in randomly. It’s like they don’t exist.”

Demetria Lucas, my favorite writer and dating advice goddess, once spoke of the wonders of self-explanatory cutie runs…simply running around the city and looking for attractive men, breaking the ice by paying them a compliment and seeing where it goes from there. And at this point, at this dry stretch of cutie absence (no calls, no texts, no nothing) – I’m willing make the first move. Waiting isn’t an option…I’ve grown too impatient. I just don’t know where to begin.

CollegeCandy ladies, where do you go to meet men?

When she’s not watching for Blue Ivy sightings or doing some serious Facebook creeping, Khalea moonlights as a print journalism major at the REAL HU, Howard University. Follow her on Twitter at @letsbeKHAlear, or feel free to Twatch. Whatever works for you.

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