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8 Goals I Totes Won’t Achieve This Semester


Goals are sometimes hard to remember. We make these really lofty claims about losing this much weight or raising our GPA an impossible amount for how far into our academic careers we are. Let’s be honest, achieving goals is really friggin’ hard and sometimes we don’t want to think about it anymore.

I think it’s healthy that I’m going into this with the totally realistic expectation that I may not even attempt to make these happen, but it’s good to dream and at least make myself feel like I’m being productive. Because at least I’m thinking about changing all these bad habits, right?

So to provide you guys with some guidance on how to completely low-ball your potential to change your ways, here are 8 goals for this semester that are most likely never going to happen:

1. I will keep my nails pretty 24/7

I don’t know why but muffed up nails really bug me. I know some girls could care less which is totally fine but it just makes me feel really scummy. I also have no patience, which is an awesome quality to have when you’re obsessed with always having a fresh manicure. I just always end up chipping them within the first day of a new polish and then my life is too crazy/there are too many good things on TV for me to sit down and redo them. Ugh.

2. I will always keep my room clean


3. I will stop spending so much at the bar

This is so hard! We all know we go out after pregaming saying we’ll be fine for the night or we’ll bum some drinks/sips off of some awesome friends but once you have that buzz going that $12 mixed drink seems like an awesome deal! I’m trying really hard with this one actually. I taped a note around my credit card that would be really embarrassing to take off while the bartender is staring at me. It reads: “Don’t use me unless you’re kidnapped.” Hopefully it works. (Not the kidnapped part.)

4. I will do all my Christmas shopping before Thanksgiving

I get really stressed out at Christmas time, mostly because my whole family loves procrastination so we’re all running around literally on Christmas Eve finding lame presents in what everyone else already picked through. This most likely won’t happen, mostly because I’m poor and things are expensive far away from the holidays but I hope to at least be able to enjoy a nice spiked egg nog on Christmas Eve and sit on the couch while every one else is freaking out for once. Wish me luck.

5. I will always check to make sure my bottoms aren’t see through before I leave the house

I don’t know why I decide to totally neglect this stage of the check list before I leave the house, but I have had some pretty embarrassing moments (they all seem to happen when I’m wearing my least favorite undies too!).

6. I will stop drinking wine out of solo cups

I just really need to try to keep it a bit classier. Nothing welcomes company better than a nice plastic cup filled with cheap pinot. Hopefully if I actually buy nice wine glasses with stems, it will mask the fact that I’m a cheapo that loves boxed wine.

7. I will do my laundry before I run out of clothing

Like any girl I have WAY too much clothing for my own good (even though we tell ourselves we always need just one more LBD 🙂 ). But seriously, I can create a pile as  tall as Shaq before I actually start running out and need to do 10 loads of laundry. If I did it little by little I wouldn’t have to dedicate a whole boring day to hand washing delicates and time fluffing my cardigans. We’ll see how this goes.

8. I will not break my phone

This probably seems weird to some of you but I am AWFUL when it comes to taking care of my phones. They always break 😦 I’ll decide to take my current case off while waiting for the super cute one in the mail and of course bust its screen open on the sidewalk because I saw a puppy across the street or something and wasn’t paying attention. So, long story short, I hope this little guy lasts!

With your guys’ support hopefully I can actually hold on to one or two of these.  (Disclaimer** I do have serious goals that are not ignored on a daily basis just so no one thinks I am a lazy freak without ambition, love ya!)

Just so I don’t feel totally alone PLEASE tell me at least one goal you’d love to achieve but know you probs won’t (it’s okay) below!

[Lead image via Ivelin Radkov/Shutterstock]

Becca is a college senior studying English lit, French, and marketing in Naperville, Illinois. She loves a warm cup of tea and a great book, and a puppy wouldn't hurt either. She hopes to one day work in the publishing industry.