It has been a long existing argument in the office over whether the two men pictured above, Tobey Maguire and Jake Gyllenhaal, look alike. I am taking this opportunity to put my foot down and say, no, they do not. And to whoever says that they do resemble one another, I would like to extend the following sentiment: you are on bath salts.
Seriously, do you even have eyes in your head? Tobey Maguire has the delicate bone structure of a vulnerable middle school boy who plays violin and occasionally pees his pants when pretty girls talk to him. Jake Gyllenhaal, on the other hand, has already hit puberty.
This movie will soon have a sequel called “Not Brothers” wherein Natalie Portman discovers these men are, gasp, not brothers. She will finally learn what the rational world has known since forever.
There are many celebrities who look alike. Katy Perry and Zooey Deschanel are one example. Daniel Radcliffe and Elijah Wood are another. Heck, some might even argue that Amy Adams and Isla Fischer bear a passing resemblance to one another; I can live with that. But Tobey Maguire and Jake Gyllenaal? Psh, you’re drunk.
Alex is Editor-in-Chief of CollegeCandy. She’s extremely angry with anyone who dares to believe Tobey Maguire and Jake Gyllenhaal look alike. You direct your Twitter rage and disapproval @AlexandraRane.