College girls have one major kryptonite, and, no, it isn’t whipped cream flavored vodka. Nothing screams “Cease and Desist” more than the word “crazy” being thrown at us. The definitions of “crazy”, according to Merriam-Webster, are: full of cracks or flaws; mad, insane; and distracted with desire or excitement.
These three ideas are put into a blender I usually save for making margaritas and thrown in our faces. By default, all girls are seen as insane crackpots about to burst with desire and excitement. Whether it’s excitement over tricking a hook-up into becoming our BF by VD (that’s boyfriend by Valentine’s Day) or getting an A in a class, witches be crazy.
Take Caroline on this season’s New Girl. In “Exes” she smashes someone’s car window, almost breaks her own shoulder to break into the gang’s loft, and gives the adorkable lead, Jess (Zooey Deschanel), foreboding advice. It’s just because she’s totally crazy, though…
Thus, it becomes every girl’s job to prove that she’s the one-out-of-ten-thousand people born with two X chromosomes that’s normal. She needs to play it cool just to seem dateable and even friendable. Once an extreme spike of emotion shows, a girl proves she’s crazy — just like everyone else that uses the women’s bathroom.
Unfortunately, it’s not just made up television characters that need to eschew the crazy moniker. Girls our age over-rationalize cheating guys, bad friends, and rude professors in the effort to not seem off-the-walls insane. It’s far easier to stifle very real feelings so we can achieve the nonchalance everyone in our generation is supposed to have than to scream at the top of our lungs in an apartment building at 1a.m.
A girl afraid of the word “crazy” will tell her hookup it’s “so completely fine” he made out with another girl directly in front of her at a party, or she’ll assure her friend “it’s so unbelievably okay” she takes her 4-month crush to a sorority date night. We’ll figure out a way to apologize to people who genuinely don’t deserve to speak to us again. From personal experience I can tell you that convincing yourself out of real emotions just to force things into being “good” isn’t worth it. A part of you will always know you’re not crazy, you’re just someone who got the short end of the stick (really!).
Obviously, keying someone’s car for not wanting to date you is bananagrams nuts. But that’s not the kind of issues girls are avoiding. Instead they’re justifying genuinely normal reactions to rude or inconsiderate people just to avoid being deemed certifiable.
Ask Caroline. All she wanted to understand was why her boyfriend of countless years broke up with her without an explanation. And that seems pretty freaking legit.
[Lead image via ilolab/Shutterstock]