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13 Totally Bonkers Sexual Misconceptions From Reddit



Reddit accomplishes a lot of amazing things but this thread where people reveal their sexual misconceptions turned out to be the literal best. Initially it was intended for sex education teachers to dish on the most bizarre questions they’ve been asked but soon users began to chime in with stories of their friends, families and personal misguided notions about sex. What’s sad is that it appears that those who are the most misinformed are the ones who were taught an “abstinence only” or deeply religious version of sexual education. Women didn’t know that they could experience pleasure from sex, teens thought Mountain Dew was birth control and don’t get me started on the mysterious “blue waffle” disease that you can Google Image Search if you dare. Check out the 13 most bonkers things we found and read the whole thread here.

1. ramencoIn sixth grade, a boy in my class, obviously unfamiliar with the female anatomy, thought that boys were shat out through the anus. The same dude asked questions about micropenises, which made us all crack up.

2. svanzuraBack when I was a wee freshman in high school, my high school sex ed teacher had to clear up that you could not pour mountain dew into a girls vagina after ejaculating into it to ensure they didn’t get pregnant. The girl who asked was pregnant 2 months later so apparently she didn’t listen very well

3. lost2012 Taught an inner city classroom in Boston. These kids asked the best questions. “Doesn’t anal cause cancer?” I’d ask, what can HIV lead to? “Does it lead to blue waffle? I don’t want to get that!” “Will Plan B work faster if you snort it?” Good times…

4. SweetBabyPhilo: I teach sex ed to individuals with intellectual disabilities, so I get to clear up loads of crazy misconceptions. During my most recent one I had to explain to a guy of relatively normal intelligence that girls do not have penises. I watched his entire mind just explode to that new information. I’m pretty sure I changed his life.

5. abhikavi: My roommate freshman year of college had no idea that women could orgasm (it wasn’t a religious university, but the girl had had an exclusively religious education prior). This came out during a discussion about a ‘screamer’ down the hall, when my roommate genuinely had no idea why a woman would be enjoying sex.

6. Ether165:  My sex ed teacher in high school told us stories about a female student she had a long time ago. The student got pregnant and was freaking out to our teacher not knowing what happened because she had apparently been taking birth control. My teacher was asking her typical questions about her situation, how long she was taking them, etc. then later the girl mentions she had been taking her birth control pills vaginally. She figured that since the baby comes from there, that’s where you take the pill.

7. caseyuerMy sister is a Sex Ed teacher. Apparently a belief that more than a few students have is that yellow skittles can act as birth control

8. rem93My friend goes around to high schools to give talks and answer questions about sex as a teacher to 16 year olds. A girl began to cry once and told the teacher (and the whole class) that she was a hermaphrodite. After calming her down and explaining it all she agreed to answer more questions for those curious. Turns out she was just talking about her clitoris and thought it was a penis. Needles to say my friend handled it so well but the girl probably had to change schools

9. ClintRenee: We had one of those. A boy asked if, during sex, his erection went away would he become stuck inside the girl.

10. mackeya879 : My sister in law until she was 16 thought that sex meant you layed side by side and the sperm crawled out of the guys belly button and into the girls belly button. We were all homeschooled, and christian.

11. why_renaissance: That I, as a 25 year old female sex ed teacher, would (a) consider going to prom with you or (b) share my personal sexual history with you. That men can’t get STDs. That “blue waffle” is a real, common, STD. That you can’t get pregnant if you douche afterward. That you can’t get pregnant if you drink a lot of Mountain Dew. That if you take ALL THE BIRTH CONTROLS (pills, depo, implanon, etc.) at once (not that any doctor would give them to you) you’re uber protected from pregnancy. Oh, and a REALLY common one — that two condoms are better than one.

12. normal_girl: I’m a teacher, but not a sex-ed teacher. My state is abstinence-only education and so most of the sex-ed is limited at best. […] Finally, after towing the company line (the only fool-proof method is abstinence, and in the absence of abstinence – take care of yourself) a girl in my class sighs and said, “Well, I will just keep doing situps after sex.” I kid you not. And some of these girls were AP/college preparatory students.Best one I heard was from the nurse at our school who was explaining all of the disease you can get from vaginal, oral, and anal sex. A girl in the class raised her hand and said, “So that’s where crack babies come from?” The nurse asked her, “What?” And the girl said, “Crack babies…you know…from anal sex.” Love abstinence only education in an overly-religious state. Teaching girls to hate their bodies and be ignorant at the same time.

13. jaymdee: I once heard the following story from a gynecologist. A young and extremely religious woman came to her near tears one day upset that she and her husband had been unable to conceive despite over a year of trying. After a brief discussion, the exam began and the doctor immediately noticed that the young woman’s hymen was intact. She had some follow up questions. The discussion went something like this: Dr.: “Is sex typically painful or enjoyable?” Pt.: “Painful.” Dr.: “After sex, do you ever feel the need to defecate?” Pt.: “Yes, every time.” Dr.: “I have good news and bad news.”

[Via. Shutterstock/marekuliasz]
    Emerald is an editor at CollegeCandy, lover of coffee, and pretend francophile. After studying writing and popular culture at NYU she decided to be a grownup and get a job. Tweet at ya' girl @EmeraldGritty.